So I'm at work right now, and I'm mad. I'm mad because I hate the heathen I'm working with. She looks like an ugly frog and has glasses thicker than your dick. She does absolutely nothing (lel @ how I'm not doing anything rn cuz I'm on my phone typing this) and smells of rotten elderberries.
Now flood, I ask you mercifully, how can I get her fired?
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UPDATE: Working with her again tonight....she's quieter than usual....in the bathroom now....flood save meh pls
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Sexual harassment.
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Plant heroin in her desk.
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Plant a copy of Destiny on her workplace. If your boss is a Desticle however, then you're in trouble. lol
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Light a fire underneath her. Or are we talking about the other kind?
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IM YOU'RE CO WORKER, BASTARD ....................../´¯/) ....................,/¯../ .................../..../ ............./´¯/'...'/´¯¯`·¸ ........../'/.../..../......./¨¯\ ........('(...´...´.... ¯~/'...') .........\.................'...../ ..........''...\.......... _.·´ ............\..............( ..............\.............\...
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Frame her for a sex scandal
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LF RAID TEAM111111!1111
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[quote]Wut do flud?[/quote]
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Beat your boss severely with an aluminum baseball bat at night, leaving a ton of evidence that it was your co-worker.
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Your trying to fire some poor orphan/adopted girl. because she doesn't help. This is pretty crazy but you could ask her to help
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Does she use tumblr?
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Change her reports to show losses and point out to your boss shes been slacking..
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Nothing is thicker than my dick
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Get into here computer (if you are at that type of job), delete all the files, and use the Internet browser to go on reddit a bunch. Then complain that she was not doing any of her actual work and show your boss her Internet browser history.
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Lace her drinks with LSD and call your boss on her.
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With fire
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Wow, you are the biggest dick in the world. Tell her to help you, but don't be a -blam!-ing ass and talk shit about what she looks like.
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Tell your manager.
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Steal her phone and send a text to yourself saying "hey isn't our boss such a fatass (: xD" and you reply and say "no, that would be mean and childish." Show it to your boss and say something along the lines of I don't think she's good for work here
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You can't, cause that would be sexist... :/ [spoiler]true story though, I know women who only have their job still because they are female, and their bosses won't fire them because they are scared of a lawsuit if they do [/spoiler]
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Light her house on fire while she's sleeping
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Sneak your own money in her purse, then demand to the boss that everyone be searched.
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I'm going to make up a story here. Just to show what can happen. Let's pretend there is a company called PnG. At PnG one of the employee's has sex with a temporary worker and gets caught. The PnG employee gets told not to do it again. Whilst the temporary employee gets fired. Could this situation work for you?
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GR8 B8 M8 I R8 8/8
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Dickslap her and blame her