originally posted in:Psykana Librarius
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I'm making this thread half informative article, half questionnaire.
We are discussing the US Foster Care system, though these are social issues to be found in most any country.
[b]The Article/Conjecture by Me[/b]
[spoiler][quote][url=http://www.merckmanuals.com/home/childrens_health_issues/social_issues_affecting_children_and_their_families/foster_care.html]Foster care is care provided for children whose families are temporarily unable to care for them. The local government determines the process of arranging foster care. Foster care is surprisingly common in the United States—about 750,000 children are in the foster care system each year....
...Most children in foster care are from poor families. About 70% of the children in foster care are put there by Child Protective Services because the child has been abused or neglected. Most of the remaining 30% are adolescents placed in care by the juvenile justice system. Very few children are placed voluntarily by their parents. Most children in foster care live with foster families, although many live with extended family and adolescents are likely to live in group homes or residential treatment facilities...
...Over half of the children eventually return to their birth families. About 20% of children in foster care are eventually adopted, most often by their foster family. Other children return to a relative or become too old for foster care. A small number of children are later transferred to another foster care agency. Tragically, 18% of youth in foster care eventually age out of the system without a sense of belonging in any family.[/url][/quote]
I am a friend of two foster care families. Both families are ideal examples of a good foster family, they have a few biological kids, and then take in young children from bad homes. The situation that's prompting me to make this post is this:
One of these families has foster custody of a four year old boy, who we will call "Y." Y's mother is in prison, and his father is a deadbeat (no steady job, petty criminal past), both are in their mid 20's. Y's adoptive parents are a 40 year old couple with a very stable family, the father runs a successful contracting company, the mother has had experience raising several other children already, and there are two adult-aged children who can assist. Y has very severe ADHD, to the point at which he cannot focus on more than one thing at a time, and has massive behavioral issues (his biological mother used crack while she was pregnant with him). Y is thriving in this foster environment, and has much better chances at a happy and healthy life than he ever would with his biological parents.
Issue 1
Little Y is a success of the foster system, but many kids in his position end up back with the biological parents once they can demonstrate stability, despite the fact that a child like Y is clearly safer in his foster home. In fact, Y's father is attempting to regain custody, something that probably won't happen, but sometimes the birth parents do get custody. We need to end the belief that a child will do better in a family simply because he is biologically related to them. [b]Economic and behavioral factors need to matter. [/b] I stress this one in particular. A couple I know took three Native American teens into their home because their mother put them up for adoption due to economic issues. She later requested them back, and the foster system agreed with her. The end result is that two of them committed suicide, and the other is in and out of drug rehab. The slight stability they had with this couple I know was broken, and the stresses of being back on the reservation were too much.
Issue 2
Foster homes. The foster parents I know are honest and hard working, but many foster homes are "child mills" where they reap tax breaks and welfare checks for care-taking these vulnerable children. These same homes are often sources of sexual and physical abuse. [b]More effort needs to be made to enforce a standard of care for children. [/b]
Issue 3
Moving children between foster homes is possibly the worst. Some kids go through dozens of homes, never forming any connection with some sort of parent figure, this leaves them adrift when they enter adulthood, [b]which makes them high risk for crime, suicide, and substance abuse. [/b][/spoiler]
[b]The Questionnaire [/b]
Do you know anyone who is currently in, or has been through, foster care?
What do you think could be done to improve the shortage of foster homes?
Should parents who lose rights to their children ever have a chance at regaining them?
I welcome any input and ideas, you'll notice I didn't use sources as heavily as I normally do in Psykana posts, this is because I'm basing this off personal interaction with foster families and adopted/fostered children.
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Edited by addiecorps: 11/17/2014 4:09:16 PMThe best thing a foster family can do is tell foster children they are loved and make them feel that way. I recently listened to a fellow class mate's life story and the guy tried to kill himself three times. His whole family was drug addicts and he was only loved by his aunt and grandma. When they died, he felt alone in the world. That guy's story made me feel like a complete asshole for not being his friend and sad that he's had such a hard life. Give love unconditionally and generously. [spoiler]Sorry if my story is unrelated, he was never in foster care[/spoiler]