You ever look at an inanimate object, an animal, or even food, and just wonder, "What if they could talk?"
Me neither. But let's do it anyways. If objects, animals, (or food) could speak, what would you want it to be, and why?
I'd choose my iPod. I wonder if it hates my music.
[spoiler]I'm out of ideas here.[/spoiler]
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My shower So yuh gonna bathe, bro er just.... Jacking off it is.[spoiler].[/spoiler]Hey man! Could probably use some shampoo! Oh...for lube? Whatever. [spoiler].[/spoiler]Hey man you look kinda drunk, need hel-now GOD DAMNITT, BOBBY THE TOILETS RIGHT THERE!