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Edited by Uuv:
11/3/2014 10:07:45 PM
44
What if they spoke?
You ever look at an inanimate object, an animal, or even food, and just wonder, "What if they could talk?"
Me neither. But let's do it anyways. If objects, animals, (or food) could speak, what would you want it to be, and why?
I'd choose my iPod. I wonder if it hates my music.
[spoiler]I'm out of ideas here.[/spoiler]
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1 ReplyThat's Disney's job
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3 RepliesAnimals can talk, just not in your language. I wish my Destiny disc could talk so it could explain why it sucks.
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4 RepliesWell, I've always assumed my toaster was racist.
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3 RepliesI bet all toilets do is talk shit.
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1 ReplyMy computer Me:let's see what's on the internets Computer:hehehe...what are you doing? Me:noth- computer:waht clas u gonna pleh?
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1 ReplyEdited by Kekyoin's Underwater Donut: 11/6/2014 10:42:55 AMThis body pillow. [spoiler]It'd say tsundere things to me and be my waifu. Then we'd have a domestic dispute and we'd have no way of providing for our many half-pillow children.[/spoiler]
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1 ReplyWell that would suck too much noise
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2 RepliesI wish humans could communicate better so we would understand each other and live peacefully.
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1 ReplyAll animals have evil thoughts and that's why everybody should eat meat.
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7 RepliesMy walls, so they could be my home security. "What'd he look like, Wall?" "He was white, large build, had a goatee... Uhh... I'm pretty sure he had like three assault rifles. Oh, and he found your porno mag collection, it's gone." "SHIT. Gotta track that guy down, thanks wall!"
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1 ReplyI would like my computer to tell me how much of a social life I have
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2 RepliesI wish spiders could speak. I could communicate with them peacefully instead of squishing the little bastards.
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11 RepliesSpecifically speaking on if the object had the some type of consciousness a human had, I would like to talk to my cellar door. All that time in the dark, he's bound to have thought of something interesting to say.
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2 Replies[i]I wonder what my phone thinks of me always muting it :\[/i]
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8 RepliesI would like to know what my shoes have to say. My poor shoes go through a lot....
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7 RepliesMy shower So yuh gonna bathe, bro er just.... Jacking off it is.[spoiler].[/spoiler]Hey man! Could probably use some shampoo! Oh...for lube? Whatever. [spoiler].[/spoiler]Hey man you look kinda drunk, need hel-now GOD DAMNITT, BOBBY THE TOILETS RIGHT THERE!
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5 RepliesProbably pets.
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1 ReplyMy pets...so I can argue with someone else besides my wife in the house.
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1 ReplyMy wang [spoiler]aka dick[/spoiler]
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2 RepliesMy bed would tell me to stop thrashing it
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1 ReplyMy headphones would always be there for me. [spoiler]or naw[/spoiler]
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1 ReplyMy Computer "Quit watching porn all day and go outside you loser." [spoiler]I might have to murder my computer.[/spoiler]
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1 ReplyI'm sure my t-shirts are tired of being used as a nut rag. Ba dum tss.
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2 RepliesMy bird speaks He asks what I'm doing and if I want to kiss him, among other things.
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9 RepliesMy dog Then I'd wonder if she actually liked me. Aw I just made myself sad :(
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6 RepliesMy toilet, I wonder if it's tired of my sh*t [spoiler]badum ts[/spoiler]
