originally posted in:The Black Garden
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The great, forceful winds continued to whip great plumes of ash across the crag ridden mountainous landscape, effectively blowing into the worn fabric of the warlocks strident cloak. It was a couple of hours before the ash storm began to subside, and Veryn could then easily view his foreign surroundings. The landscape seemed to Veryn as a desolate and inhospitable place, blanketed with plumes of volcanic dust, and riddled with great mountains, surrounded by widespread lapidarian steppes. What little wildlife that was able to live in such a crude climate, appeared to be nothing more than minute, shelled creatures that burrowed themselves deep within the ashen soil. The wide range of exotic and unfamiliar creatures that inhabited many of the unknown, foreign planets deeply fascinated Veryn. He would often collect specimens of such creatures to study and observe in his vault at the Tower. Although many of the other Guardians and councilors thought Veryn very peculiar because of his personality and interest in such alien objects, he did not mind. Veryn mostly kept to himself, and, because of this, was often thought of as extremely condescending and egotistic by many of the other Guardians in his Fire team (partially because, at times, he was). Veryn had always thought of himself as a "lone wolf", of sorts, and surreptitiously despised the presence of the other guardians that he was assigned to. However, Veryn had no company with him on this particular mission. In fact, this was not a mission at all. At least, not a mission that had been given or assigned to him. Veryn came to this particular place on his own accord, and did not intend to leave. This was a mission in which there is no return, no reward, and no spoils of any sort.
The Crowe- Should I continue?
Please leave a comment if you think that I should spend more time on it.
English
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overall it is good, the only suggestion i would make is to replace the parentheses with "and perhaps at times he was"