And on the Ei8hth Day...
Yes, maybe it looks like EiBhth. Back in the day, 8 was written with the lower loop below the bottom line.
Seven years, Bungie.net. And eight days, but that’s only because I was in London on the actual day, and therefore forgot about it. I’m a travesty, I know. But seven years. It’s been fun, there’s no denying that. Has it been worthwhile? What sort of a stupid question is that? Of course it has!
See, I was drawn here because of you-know-what. The big H. That’s right, the thing I’ll use any opportunity to link, [url=http://halo.bungie.net/Forums/posts.aspx?postID=17207937]Hola: Parodies Evolved[/url]. Writing out what’s in your head is immensely satisfying. Sharing it, all the more so. Now, I can’t remember the exact process through which I went (pretty sure I wrote the thing partially reliant on Dave Candland’s guides for the first game, as well as the Prima guide, starting during Easter 2006), but I got up and running on Bnet maybe a month later: 20 May. Good thing I had a brief think about the military designation of my main character, else many of you would know me as Martian 118. Good lords.
I made friends: Iceman Assassin and ObsidianAura are the first two I remember forming my merry band with. Unfortunately, the latter dropped off the radar maybe a month or two later. Gods know what he’s up to now. He could be dead. Really. Iceman may still be around; I played with him once during H3, and who doesn’t remember his monstrously popular ‘IT’S SO OBVIOUS, WHY DIDN’T I SEE IT BEFORE?!’ thread in the same forum, before that glorious game launched? I’ll tell you who doesn’t, post-2007 or ‘08 losers.
Soon, I had a veritable smorgasbord of chums, and decided to forge a testament to my own e-ego. That’s electronic ego, not a stammer. Thus was TARTAN-IIs born, my very own private group for shenanigans and shamelessly sharing my first few parodies, chapter by painfully unread chapter. My writing attracted amused eyes. Members of the old guard, Colonel Corbec and Pyroshark were soon in the group, the former advised to have a look by the latter, along with Sid Saber, squirrel dude and oh shit, I’m probably forgetting a few really cool and important guys. Lord Snakie and jmh9072 were there, too.
Then, it happened. Halo 3 released, and everything changed. I thoroughly enjoyed endless hours of online multiplayer with some of the best friends I’ve ever had, and Halo 3 firmly cemented itself as my favourite game of all time. Not even the sublime BioShock or the superlative Half-Life (which I played to completion in 2009, hence its position after H3) could best it for sheer enjoyability. Bungie has my eternal gratitude for that incredible feat of gaming glory, amongst many other proud achievements that have benefitted me and countless others.
Back on the website, my ability to articulate myself, combined with my rampant, dickish, militant atheism of the time, led me to join such bastions of the community as Discussion Corner (anyone actually know what became of Lord Scyolinx?), Brothers in Christ and The Black Chapter. Then, dramaz ensued, and people liked people that other people liked and other people got gelatinous and shit went down and people stopped talking to each other. Not that that affected by rampant occupation of The Flood and my mercilessly cheerful attempts to befriend everyone who can spell correctly, whilst verbally decapitating and alienating those who could not, and more, wider friendships were forged as my elder chums went their separate ways, namely to actually get a life, as I did not (and still have barely acquired one).
Uhh, what happened then? Probably kept trolling the -blam!- out of the poor religious folk of Brothers in Christ, which is now pretty much a wasteland, convinced many of them of atheism whilst the steadfastly lenient administration looked on and a few raging fundies were thwarted by their own fury time and again. It was fun, which is probably why I tired of the grinding politics and economic dreariness of The Black Chapter, and pretty much started ignoring it; I couldn’t argue with people who used facts, logic, and, worst of all, [i]numbers[/i] to support their arguments. Seriously, I’m shit at maths and economics is perhaps the most boring part of politics I can think of. With BiC becoming a cesspool of inactivity, banned Orthodox kids and unfunny topics, groups were losing their charm. Enter Sapphire.
I shan’t bother detailing my primary reason for joining here, but needless to say it involved the J word. Or name. Username. Charmed as I was by a simple compliment, I hopped in and took a look, finding myself in pretty much a second Flood, without the shit, but with more of the rampant elitism, to the point where, after months and months in the place, contributing every day, as much as I could, I was still barely noticed. Lucky, then, that I had also founded The Writer’s Corner.
It was arguably a foolhardy move on my part; people were talking about writing in The Flood. ‘I know!’ thought I, ‘I’ll start a writing group, and people will like and acknowledge me for it!’ Whilst I have nothing but praise for the netizens of the Water Closet, still more for their artistic talent than their tolerance of me as a blundering administrator, I can’t say it was my wisest move on Bnet. Still, the group flourished under my minimal supervision, and the other staff and moderators, chief amongst them the beloved AngryBrute1 and the peerless Rampant Tragedy, performed their duties more than admirably.
Darkness swelled as Bungie left behind the verdant, if utterly glassed, pastures of Reach and Halo forever, though the community burned bright and loud in Big Brother’s silence. Sapphire, ever the impregnable circle-jerk of self-righteous, self-declared, hyper-political attention whores and American football fans, lost my interest, and I seceded from the union. No doubt they love me all the more for the attention I’m granting them now, so I’ll just say, ‘You’re welcome, kids, and keep up the venomously hypocritical work of making the site more about petty group politics than community and videogaming.’
And now here we stand, on the brink of another revolution in console gaming. Destiny looms overhead like the Traveller itself. [url=http://www.liveforfilms.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/02/destiny-traveller.jpg]Will it bring the unprecedented, connected thrill of a seamless, living world in which we all enjoy countless hours together?[/url] [url=http://cdn.gamerant.com/wp-content/uploads/Destiny-screenshot-the-traveller.jpg]Or will it be an underwhelming disappointment, leaving the community as barren as ever in the wake of Halo’s departure?[/url] Well, obviously the former, but I wanted to point out how weirdly inconsistent the scale of these images are. Srsly, Bungle. fix ur shit.
One thing’s for certain: bungie.net has been my home for the last seven years, and I will embrace Destiny in the company of the finest community I have ever known. I may not know most of you, I may not even recognise some of you, but I sure as hell love reading everything you lot have to say. Not you, SecondClass. I’ve muted you.
Shouts-out to my current bros: CammCam, Zero Cool, Dropship dddduuuuuuuuudddddddde, POKEY CLYDE and YahwehFreak4evr.
[spoiler]This is technically the ninth day, if the 20th was the first...[/spoiler]
TL;DR: I've been here seven years, and somehow I love it more everyday. how do i even
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Necrobump But really, nice job. Good thread. And I just read Hola: PE in one sitting. Surprisingly good read.