originally posted in:Officer Nastys Deputies
Alright, so it seems like someone has left me a rather confusing surprise on my car. When I got out of class and went to open my door, I laid my eyes upon this mysterious substance. To me, it just looks like someone has a sour opinion of me and decided to spit on the handle. However, this could be something completely different.
Now, this can either mean one of two things: One, somebody is a straight up asshole and decided to spit on my door handle for whatever reason. Two, this substance on my car isn't spit, rather something else that you can use your imagination to figure out, and they're sending me a message of some sort. Either way, I've already accidentally touched it, so I've initiated this stranger's master plans on me.
halp me, Flood
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Edited by ooo2412: 5/9/2014 7:38:42 PMWe know you made this up.
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Sorry bby I got excited when I saw ur car ;)
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#JizzedOnMyCar [spoiler]lol'd it[/spoiler]
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Clorox is your friend
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Lick it, if it tastes like last night it's semen.
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Slice their tires or put a potato in their exhaust for revenge.
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The Semen Bandit strikes again!
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'twas not me
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Lick it
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Were you near a sidewalk? I spit all the time when I run, though I don't tend to hit anything other than the ground, I can see how this might happen.
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Take samples and go to a science-y friend and test it...
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Haha no, if it's bird poop do this^
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Looks like bird shit, the splatter is too wide.
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Taste it
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So somebody essentially jizzed on your hand. Jizz back I say. You once told me it's not gay if you don't look them in the eye.
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Bird piss.
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They want the D.
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Just get a baby wipe and get it off or something. Inform the school authorities as well just in case the person's shenanigans start to get really out of hand
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Just looks like spit.
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Release some of your own saliva on it, and see if they procreate. Then you will have discovered our saliva is actually a living being(s).
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Bird. And yes it most certainly could have hit the car at this angle. Birds are indiscriminate bomb droppers. If it was flying over the car and unloaded, it easily could have done this.
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Lick it.
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Eat it, it's the only option.
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I was going to joke about it being jizz, but if you tagged it... D:
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It looks like bird shit.