>I was only 9 years old at the time
>I loved shrek so much, I had all the merchandise and movies
>I pray to shrek every night before bed, thanking him
>My dad hears me and calls me a FGT
>I knew he was just jealous of my devotion for Shrek
>I called him a FGT and he left
>He slaps me and sends me to go to sleep
>I'm crying now and my face hurts
>I lay in bed and it's really cold
>A warmth is moving towards my butt
>I feel something touching me
>It's Shrek
>I am so happy
>He whispers into my ear "This is my swamp"
>He grabs me with his powerful ogre hands
>I go into doge* style
>I'm ready
>I spread my butt cheeks for Shrek
>He penetrates me
>It's hurts but it's all for Shrek
>I can fell my butt tearing
>I push against his force
>I want to please Shrek
>He roars his might ogre roar as he fills my butt with his love
>My dad walks in
>Shrek looks him in the eye and says "It's ogre"
>Shrek leaves through my window and returns back to his swamp
>Shrek is Love, Shrek is Life
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I have an Alt account on my PS4 that I was planning to call ShingekiNoShrektum (Shrektum Onslaught) but I ran out of characters so I settled with ShingekiNoShrek. After each game of Jihadiing/dicking about in BF4 I choose someone to receive shrek's blessing. Then I plug my keyboard into the PS4 and start to preach the word of shrek to the last guy I kill in each round. I did consider the copypasta but I don't want to get banned when I've had it for a month <.< The message chain goes as follows #Shrekt -reply- Shrek is Love, Shrek is Life. -reply- Have you decided to let your lord and saviour, Shrek, into your life? -reply- Let his ogrey goodness fill your void with his grace and love. Shrek is Love, Shrek is Life. -No replies after this so far- I'll try to work out a way to get screens of some of the good ones later :D