I like what I've read so far, but just a tip: Try to keep everything in one tense. You keep shifting the narrative between past and present. [quote]He tucked away his binoculars into his pack, resting on a nearby wall, after giving up on the idea of ever witnessing the suspicious activity their informant had claimed. Stretching his back, he walked over to his sleeping partner, Isabelle. “Wake up you bum…” [i]As he nudges her foot with his. He groans at the lack of response and pushes her shoulder with his boot. As she begins to fall to the side, she wakes up, letting out a startled gasp.[/i][/quote] Do you see what I mean? There are a couple of other issues, such as the fact that something spoken by a character requires a new line of text. But, so far, so good. The setting seems pretty interesting, and the more help you get, the better you'll become at this. Keep it up!