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Edited by Steel Assassin: 3/18/2013 5:13:09 PM
19

Diagnose me, internet!

Cracked has given me some faith that asking a medical question on the internet won't fail entirely. Here's hoping this doesn't, you know, do that. I've had this really annoying but infrequent pain for the past few years. It always begins in the bottom of my jaw, feeling as if nearly all the roots of my bottom teeth are in pain. After a few moments, the pain migrates to between my shoulder blades, most of the pain residing near the spine. The pain usually lasts for at least half an hour, if not hours, and the pain usually increases until it finally stops. Got any thoughts, florum? I've went to the hospital before about it, but the pain vanished by the time I arrived, and they thought I was an addict trying to get drugs. Someone once suggested it could be a pinched nerve, but I don't know.

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  • There's a tiny alien living in your tooth. Every now and then it has to run to its food stores, located down your spine, so it hops in its tiny drill machine and drills its way there and back. The only way to get rid of it is to take out the teeth it resides in. Unfortunately, as we don't know which tooth that is, you'll just have to yank them all. I hope you have pliers and a good painkiller. Oh, and I once read a Wikipedia article on dentistry so I know what I'm talking about.

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