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Edited by Insane Gunman: 2/11/2013 10:10:31 AM
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I just got rejected by a girl I really like

Tonight I finally told a girl I’ve liked for a while now how I fell about her. As the title implies, her reaction wasn’t what I was hoping for. We’ve been friends/co-workers for quite some time now and her and I had started hanging out about a month and a half ago. Not to long after I started spending time with her, I started to have serious feelings for her. Those feelings finally culminated tonight when we were outside my house with a few other friends of ours. I pulled her aside and asked if we could talk in private. When she reluctantly agreed I already had an idea of how it was going to end. I started telling her that I think of her as more then a friend and I knew things were bad when she said she needed to be alone and had her friend drive her home not too long after. About 10 minutes later I called her and when she didn’t answer I sent her a text asking why she reacted the way she did. This was the response I got (yes, my name is Kyle): [quote]Lol i really dont like doing this....kyle i already know u like me, ive know for a while now..and i hope u dont think i was trying to send you mixed signals cuz im not...the only signals i tryed sending you were ones saying hey i dont think of you like that, but honestly kyle ur really chill and if i culd i would hangout with u everyday..but just as friends..and i know that sounds wayyy over said but i just was scared for this to happen cuz i didnt want to hurt you. I really dont want this to change our friendship, like the way we act around each other, or us playing xbox, i hope we can still be cool kyle, i really do cuz ur really fun to be around, ur funny,smart, and overall an amazing person and someday u will find the right person. I just never thought of u like that thats all..plz dont hate me:([/quote] I’m pretty sure the rest of my friends left the second they saw me slam my car door shut and slowly walk into my house. I’ve never felt this strongly about another person before in my life and being shut down like this made my cry for the first time in probably a decade. This is probably the most depressed I’ve ever felt in my life and it’s honestly overwhelming. We exchanged a few more texts (which only worsened my mood) and we’ve since then agreed to remain good friends. The problem is: I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to think of her as just a friend. I know that we’ll never be able to be a couple, but I just don’t see how I’ll ever be able to think of her any differently. I’ll be going on a Spring Break camping trip with her and a few other co-workers in about a month and I’m afraid we’ll have a tough time being together after everything that happened tonight. My question to you guys is: Have you ever been friendzoned by a girl you have/had strong feelings for? If so, were you able to reconcile your friendship, or was the awkwardness of the whole situation too much for you two to handle? Any advice would be great you guys! (Yes, I understand this resembles a blog and you’ve all probably seen a million of these already, but I need to vent and seeing as none of my friends are awake, B.net seems like a decent outlet.) UPDATE: I thought I might as well put up the messages that we exchanged after that first one she sent me, seeing as they’re pretty strange IMO. These are all from that same night. Me (after the one she sent me that’s posted above.): [quote]I understand... goodnight angie[/quote] Her: [quote]Seriously kyle?[/quote][quote]Plz dont be mad...[/quote] Me: [quote]Im not upset with you... i just need to try and get some sleep. im sorry for any drama i stirred up. Ive never been that type of person before.[/quote] Her: [quote]Okay good i just didnt want it to be awkward at all cuz like seriously i love hanging with u! Once i turn 18 in september were going to a strip club k?[/quote] Me: [quote]I aint about that life.... but in all honesty, given the circumstances, i dont think i’d be able to do that.[/quote] Her: [quote]Haha go to a strip club?[/quote] Me: [quote]Ya, maybe things will be different by september though... i would hope so at least.[/quote] Her: [quote]Lol wht do u mean?[/quote] Me: [quote]The awkwardness that you know will exist between us... atleast on my side... im sorry, but you’re the first person ive felt this way about so i need time. We’re still friends but i hope you understand why it might be hard for me to think about you in the same way you think about me.[/quote] Her: [quote]Ya no i completly agree! Maybe i can help u find someone?[/quote] Me: [quote]Dont feel like you need to do that. Like i said, i just need to give it time.[/quote] Her: [quote]Yeah i understand[/quote] Me: [quote]Goodnight angie[/quote] Her: [quote]Night kyle[/quote]

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  • My advice date someone who uses proper grammar.

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  • I know that feel, bro. I told someone that I like that I had (at least) a strong crush on her, and the response was a friendzone/pushing away. The feeling was worse than almost anything, except the death of a family member.

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  • The best thing you can do is to cut of contact hon, she is friendzoning you. Don't let her do that, don't communicate with her.

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  • She wants to take you to a strip club? dang

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    • Dude. Hang on to that feeling. That pain. Those butterflies go away when you hit about 25. Thats what I miss the most about being young. Trust me man you will feel it again. Let it go and move on. I wouldn't even talk to her anymore. Trust me.

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      • I was rejected by a girl I like too. One of these days I will have my revenge.

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      • wow man...you must really like her. I have a girl in my life that I feel that way about. and I really want to work up the courage to tell her. And I could see this exact same thing happening. I dont know what to say. I just hope that maybe if you spend a lot more time with her, that she'll warm up to you?

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      • That was a smooth way of handling things btw

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      • There there. Want some gummy bears?

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      • At least you had the courage..

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      • Your lucky she didn't just stop talking to you, I lost a great friend with a brilliant personality and sole when I finally expressed my feelings. (She even played the original three Halos (at that time I didn't think girls like that even existed))

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      • Damn... the friendzone... I can taste it xDDD Anyway OP I've kind of been there fairly recently. That girl who is still my very good friend went back to her ex and shit. Thing is, we have everything BUT love, great friendship, great chemistry and also pretty damn great mutual attraction. BUT she loves her ex. Love was a deal breaker. And it was also me that encouraged her to get back with her ex since there was no reason for the 2 to break up in the first place. I got through it pretty abruptly. I used the emotional freedom I acquired to work on myself and myself only. We're great friends still, thing is we no longer make out and rub each other. So basically OP, just try to get over it, don't stop talking to her. Be her friend, I also thought that I wouldn't be able to bear not being with my friend but I'm well over that. Just think about yourself. ONLY about yourself. Don't be emotionally dependent from her.

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      • Edited by SweetTRIX: 2/12/2013 8:37:12 PM
        It's a crappy feeling to be sure, no one likes to be told their only good enough for X but not for Y, but it is one of those things consistently at risk when you share your feelings. Best thing you can do is just look at it as a learning experience, and next time try not to get so invested emotionally until you know that she may be just as interested in you, and make sure you hold true to what you said and don't punish "Angie" for not returning the sentiment.

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      • Sorry, I'm not reading that. Why? Because rejection is a very, VERY common thing in life. You're not the only one to go through this OP. Just forget about it, remember in a couple years or perhaps months this won't even have any significance in your life whatsoever, and move on.

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        • How touching.

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        • Edited by Expunge: 2/11/2013 9:46:48 PM
          No offense but does do you think anyone here cares about your problems enough to read all of that. EDIT: Boy I sure was bored.

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          • The beauty about all this is now you know. It's going to take a while for you to get over this girl, and there's nothing wrong with that. Just don't go all crazy if you ever see her with another guy or if she's dating. Your job right now is to concentrate on yourself. Do things you like, be productive. The entire situation sucks, I know, I was there in high school, I got rejected by my long-time crush too. Don't make the relationship between the two of you awkward, show that you can be mature about it. Move forward and things will come your way. All else fails, the best way to get over one girl, is to get under another ;)

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          • Edited by Onion Beetle: 2/11/2013 11:27:56 PM
            FRIENDZONED. Happened to me too, nothing one can do apart from suck it up and move on.

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          • This is your chance to really take this in stride and change yourself for the better. You're in high school I presume so get a job, do charity work, extracurriculars, put down the xbox for awhile and when she says she wants to hang out say I can't I'm getting myself together for college. Start being more of an adult, go to the gym, get a job if you don't have one. She probably views you as a little immature which is why she views you as a friend. You can change yourself for the better and if it still doesn't work out you still come out better anyway. Get on it OP!

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            • There's no way I'm reading all of that. You shouldn't have pulled her aside from friends to talk about that. Why the hell did you slam your car door? Petty behavior.

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              • You didn't use the toast/envelope method bro. You set yourself up for failure.

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              • +1 for a girl thread that wasnt "OMG i'm in love but i cant tell her" It's good that you told her you liked her. And you can still be friends. I've been in a similar situation. There was a girl that was my best friend for a long time, then i eventually got feelings for her. Things didnt work out that way though, and we decided to just be friends. We were really close that summer, and my feelings never went away so eventually i decided we had to talk about it again. She said it wouldnt work out and all the usual stuff, and said we should still just be friends. But i didnt let got of the feelings and eventually it started to cause problems. After a year of having feelings for her i finally moved on, and our friendship has been back to normal ever since. Moral of the story: The sooner you move on the sooner you can be friends with her.

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              • Just make it the way it was before.

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              • Relationships with women? just my mom and my sisters. Aside from that i'm just a creepo

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                • OP, do you fall in love with her again everyday? Does she bring the sun and chase the night away?

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                • I'm no relationship expert, but here's my two cents: She may just be attracted to another dude atm. If she really likes you for your personality and thinks you're a great person, she might realize later that she does want to be in a more serious relationship. It's not unheard of. Maybe she just ain't ready to be in a relationship. Give it time man.

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