Page 143 Variks allows the eager hunter to remove his cloak while he settles into his room. Heavy fabric falls into Shadow’s hands, and she carries it away to set it down, enjoying the soft fur between her fingers. Their conversation tonight had left her more curious than anything and she finds it difficult to alter her train of thought. She turns back to him with golden eyes narrowed as she inspects him. He peels off a glove, and then notices her staring. The icy glow of the scribe’s eyes makes her freeze. “What are you thinking about?” he asks, returning her narrow eyed stare. “How do you know I’m thinking about something?” A smirk of discomfort forms across her face. “I know that look. You do this when you are thinking about something …important.” Shadow crosses her arms, frustrated at the effortless way he reads her. “Well?” Inwardly, she sighs. Her resolve falters. Shadow knows what she wants to ask will not receive a welcoming response. “You’ve seen everything I have to offer,” she begins, raising a hand and changing her tone. “Nothing has been hidden from you.” She’s copying the way Variks would attempt to persuade someone. “As have you.” The flat response makes her stomach sink. Of course his own tricks won’t work on him. Eyes flicking over his arms, she hesitates. But she lingers there for to long. Noticing this, Variks shifts wearily. “Technically—“ “No.” The sudden command catches her off guard, and her arms uncross. “What?” “[i]No[/i],” he repeats firmly, turning from her as he removes his mask. “But I didn’t even say anything!” she exclaims, indignant. “I know what you are thinking, and my answer is no.” “Why?!” Shadow marches over to him, gazing up into his eyes with a frustrated expression. “That’s not fair, Variks—“ “It’s not [i]fair?[/i]” he responds instantly, sneering down at her in disgust. The reaction makes her hesitate; she knows she’s pushing a sore spot. Guilt stirs in her stomach as he scolds her like a child. “Who are you to tell me what’s fair?” he goes on. His eyes wander over her body, searching for a similarity that does not exist. “How could you possibly compare us?” Shrinking in defeat, the awoken falls silent. “I’m sorry. I just thought that since you’ve seen all of me, I would get to see all of you. I know it’s not the same, but it’s been a long time. After everything I’ve shared with you… I thought…” She bows her head in submission. A sigh ruffles the black and blue hair on her head. Slowly returning her eyes to Variks, she watches his head tilt up as if asking the Great Machine why he allowed her to be his partner in the first place. “Why do you wish to shame me?” he croaks. Shadow blinks rapidly, confused. “That’s not what I want at all. I just want to know you— All of you.” Staring at her for a long moment, Variks wilts. “Is nothing I do enough for you?” The question stings, and she flinches away from him. “Of course it is... I just... want to be able to love all of you. I can’t fully do that if there are parts of you I haven’t even seen.” Another long, drawn out pause. Thinking it may be better to drop the subject, Shadow prepares to leave him to rest. “I-“ “Fine.” His voice is as cold as Europa’s ice when he cuts her off. Mouth still open, Shadow manages a nod. “Okay.” Was he really agreeing to this? The nagging thought makes her want to ask him why he had changed his mind but she isn’t about to lose an opportunity. “Wait.” He gestures for her to give him privacy, and Shadow slowly turns towards the door. She takes a deep breath as it opens, stepping through to the other side to wait for him. She sits. As she waits, Shadow vaguely remembers staring at Variks’s arms in curiosity the first time they had met. He had snapped at her to look away, and since then, she had barely spoken of them despite her urge to ask. Now, she can’t ignore that urge. The fact that he is still unwilling even after everything they had been through is concerning to her. Had she not proven herself trustworthy enough? Shame bubbles up in her chest in response to her selfishness. [i]You’re a guardian. You’ve never had to worry about losing limbs, you always come back fully restored.[/i] Eventually, she re enters, blinking as her eyes are met with darkness. She gives them a moment to adjust. Letting the door close behind her only makes it worse, and she waits impatiently for the weak starlight from the window to assist her vision. Finally, she can make out the eliksni sitting by that window, her instinct to approach him. But even Shadow, for all her confident declarations, is left speechless. Her face falls into a blank, wide eyed stare. Variks whittles away at a spare crystal of his, clearly having been waiting for her. His robes and mechanical arms tossed unceremoniously on his desk. Unsure how to feel, the hunter holds a breath. The sight is not at all what she had expected. If she even knew what to expect at all. As she stares at his docked flesh, she struggles to remind herself that she has seen many dregs with arms cut. But this feels very different. Suddenly realizing her expression would have been entirely rude, she hurriedly corrects herself, appalled that she had stared like any other would have. Although her face doesn’t show it, she begins to feel a heavy, suffocating warmth in her chest. She had been waiting for the feeling. Her shoulders lose some of their tension. Nothing has changed, no matter how strange Variks may appear. Her throat tightens with an undeniable love as she watches him. Despite her presence, Variks continues to work as if she isnt there, as if he doesn’t want to see her reaction. Quietly, she approaches him, interlocking her hands and moving them nervously. She listens to him scraping against the gemstone, realizing though he had appeared calm, his movements are stiff. Discomfort becomes clear in every twitch of muscle. The hunter’s shoulders sag with guilt. She feels sorry for asking him for this. Lost, she simply looks down at the stone. “That’s a pretty crystal.” He stops. She sits beside him, keeping her eyes on his hands. “Will be prettier when I am done with it,” he burbles. Silence presses around them. “Surely not as pretty as you.” She allows her eyes to wander up to his face. No response. Variks stares harder at the movements of his knife. “You’re so talented with these. Could you make me another one?” she asks nonchalantly, barely managing to avoid staring at his arms. “Yes,” he replies shortly. Shadow’s heart sinks. “Now say what you really want to say,” he says quietly. She looks up again, unable to hold back a frustrated smile. “I want to say, ‘how do you do that?’” “You are not that hard to understand,” he mutters. “Speak.” His sharpness makes her flinch. No words come as she opens her mouth. She simply stares at him, thinking for a long moment in silence. “Variks…” He gives her an awkward glance before flicking his eyes back downward. “Thank you,” she says. He looks up again. “What are you thanking me for?” Shadow fights against the tightness in her throat. “For saving my people.” He blinks all four eyes out of sync, clearly taken aback. The knife ceases its frantic scraping. “You’re the reason we’re still here. You should be proud of this.” She gestures to his arms. Anger flares in his eyes, making her shrink back. But it’s gone before she can speak, and he turns his face from her. “I could never be proud of this.” His voice deepens with emotion. “But,” he adds after a small pause. “You are welcome. I would do it again.” Shadow smiles, reaching out her hands to him. With more than a little hesitation, he grasps them, pulling her up to sit on his lap. Careful not to touch him, she links her hands across her stomach. He stares into her eyes. “You see something I can’t,” he rasps, voice breaking. Shadow stares up at him with wide golden eyes. “I see a hero.” “Hmm… poor eyesight?” he replies dryly. “I don’t care what other people say. You’re [i]my[/i] hero. And you’re a hero to the awoken, even if they don’t act like it.” He turns his face from her. “I am sure my own people do not see me as the hero you do.” “No,” she replies honestly. “Most don’t. It’s the price we pay for choosing the path that few dare to walk. My people don’t see me as a hero either. But I have assisted them many a time and at the end of the day, all I wanted was peace between our people.” The two of them dwell in that similarity for a moment, a link in the weak little chain that holds them together. [i](continued below)[/i]