[quote][b]Lee, on board a plane returning from vacation, prepares to finish what he started. It was January 6th, but God Dammit the world still needs Christmas. Lee hangs off the side of the plane and facetimes charles[/b][/quote]
[b]Lee[/b]: Charles... is it ready?
[b]Charles[/b]: *[i]the drugs that makes people sleepy? :o[/i]*
[b]Lee[/b]: Charles, dont call it that you idiot
[b]Charles[/b]: *[i]yes sir! :D its ready![/i]*
[quote][b]Lee ends the call and takes one last look at his list[/b][/quote]
[quote][b]Offtopics Wishlist:[/b]
Hallmark: a wii remote
Tuskenator: Xbox One X
Nil: Cold Rain
RollTide: Sunday off from work
RagingRedHead: a 14 year old black cat
Pandora: ice skates and a plank of wood
Lotr: a shirt that says id like a new shirt
Jeff H: the Bubonic plague
Rheuben: Elmer's glue stick & a paralyzed reindeer
Cozy man Cam: venezuela healthcare
Raider: a witch who watches you while you sleep
HiddenAlignment: McDonald's Big Mac recipe
Saint Nick: an AK-47
Captain Kelp: the mailman wrangler who wrangles with his mom
Mafaderal: a Gundam plushie
Surefire: a USB stick with malware
Wombat dubs: a baby monitor
Combat Mind: a rubber ducky record player
Farmer: Being loved by God
Cultmeister: Greys Anatomy: Guess who edition
Ion: The speed of Lees thrusts
Slayer of Worms: A cruise ship and mandalorian armor (s1:ep1)
El Taco: calcium and a chart to find -blam!-
H1voc: a money-flavored burger
OLDBOYvicous: otter returns to #Offtopic
Fordrof: God damming graphics cards to hell
Loot: Mariah Carrey
NotZephyr: an invisible man from the 1650's
BusyBadger: for me to slam all the keys on my -blam!-ing keyboard geez pick something in English -blam!-
Super_Smitty: a huge bowl from Cleveland
Alexander Crowley: an Xbox 360 with gold, and a PS vita
Washed: a bag of bananas you can throw
Skuld: A pack of tic tacs
Mr Man: a Nintendo brand light switch
WraithSpectre: Femboy Lee
Budgie: A trans woman
Man Of War: a ukulele
Stache Man: A PS3 and an Xbox series X
Owen: The Horn of an African Tribe
RingLeader: a furry dragon cosplay
Acgy: a light bulb
KrunckleFuddles: A dog with stage 4 cancer
Snipetastic: for his race to raise their guns against others
Skooma: A Lee The Sheriff body pillow with a built in hole and extension
Fuhd: a 5 second blink
Girraffalope: a drunk aunts gift bag from her 40th birthday party
Jon Snow: Everything
SackBoys: A Travis Scott live event
RufousTeacher: Hell
GhostRider: Dominatrix Boots
Crazy Cobalt Man: Ancient Rome Spartan armor and a 2$ plastic fan from the gas station
Pure Vessel: A hornet body pillow
Panzer: N@zi Minecraft
Veggie: An average sized blade that all the maidens can admire with a faint smile
Book Goblin: to keep his busted ass used car
Speaker: Beyond meat: Human Flesh limited edition
Fart Bucket: A microwave
Regretful123: 13/1/2020
Inferno: Cars 2 Video Game: wii u edition
Cool Username: a salty chip
JediArcher: Destiny 1: The collection[/quote]
[quote][b]Lee looks up onto the land of the mighty, and carries the magic bag on his shoulders [url=https://youtu.be/XAYhNHhxN0A]he jumps[/url][/b][/quote]
[quote][b]as the wind hits his face, he shoots a bullet upwards, and a parachute explodes out of the bullet. Lee lands, and sees Rheuben passed out on Offtopic Squares rocky floor.[/b][/quote]
[b]Lee[/b]: Oh -blam!- -blam!- -blam!- boy, I got a gift a gift for you!
[quote][b]Lee flops a paralyzed reindeer and an Elmer's glue stick ontop of Rheubens unconscious body[/b][/quote]
[b]Lee[/b]: Alright... who's next? >:D
[quote][b]Lee spots hidden alignments body flopped over in the fountain[/b][/quote]
[b]Lee[/b]: -blam!- -blam!- -blam!-, hidden my boy! Here you are!
[quote][b]Lee throws the bottle with the big mac secret recipe next to hiddens half-in-the-water body. [/b][/quote]
[quote][b]Lee already felt good, spreading holiday cheer. Everyone would wake happy, and no one would sneer! Merry Christmas Offtopic, and a have a happy new year[/b][/quote]
[b]~Your Magnum D_ng Sheriff[/b]
They censor the Santa phrase, wow
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Blast beats here I come 😈 *plays Painkiller drum intro*