"Chicken wire may be large" an expert entomologist and Malaria expert told the Planar Review, "but it will stop as much as 1% of mosquitoes from entering your house, which is a big win when you think about how many people are dying of malaria."
A new study, conducted by Standford scientists, forcefully expelled mosquito swarms from a pressurized nozzle and measured the effectiveness of various barriers at stopping the insects form gaining ingress.
"We were surprised when we saw how many mosquitoes were either killed or stopped outright when they splatted against the chicken wire" the expert said.
Various research endeavors worldwide have examined the effectiveness of different mosquito barriers in response to the new and deadly malaria strain that has swept the world in recent months. With a kill rate approaching 0.5% health officials are alarmed at how many people in their 90s are dying.
"Its horrible" Karren Kurzek said, a New Orleans resident. "Just because there is a shortage of screens right now, and we have to reserve those screens for our gated communities, doesn't mean my grandma shouldn't be able to open the window. This is simply unjust."
For residents like Karren, chicken wire has proven a viable alternative to the standard screening that is in short supply.
"Now my grandma can feel safe when she opens the windows. Science has shown that chicken wire does stop some mosquitoes. Better still, it is cheap and available at home depot."
The Louisiana governor is considering mandating chicken wire use in all residential areas to combat the Malaria pandemic. However, the proposed mandate is meeting stiff resistance by a vocal and militant minority that opposes chicken wire use. Ant-wire protesters assembled outside the Louisiana state capitol building claiming that chicken wire is useless. Local authorities were horrified, as many protestors were likely getting bitten even as they protested, and very few were wearing long sleeves.
"I was there and I didnt smell any DEET" a local sheriff deputy claimed.
"We need to come together and do our part" the governor reiterated in his Wednesday address. "Malaria kills. It strikes when you least expect it and it targets the old and compromised. Stop whining and get your windows covered. Use the chicken wire. If all homes used chicken wire for just 3 weeks straight, we would see an end to this terrible disease..."
Planar Review, Krishnas Prophet reporting. Copyright July 2020
-
I had to see if the rumors were true