Ambush!!! Ambush!!!
As Crowley is blasting through some pirates that tried attacking his dreadnought, The Trinity, he picks up massive heat signal coming up from the neighboring gas giant.
He swivels around to the planet in the captains chair*
“Uhhhh...Guns? Ready all batteries. We have an issue. Engines? Prepare for jump back to Hell.”
The corresponding stations respond one by one*
“Let’s see what we have here.” Crowley notices something minuscule no one could except him* “Damnit.”
He disappears, and reappears outside the dreadnought just in time to block a giant sword slash from the mysterious heat signal, with his lightsaber, which grew in size with him*
“This’ll be annoying.”
“Of course Son. It always is with you.”
The space giant swings their sword in a plunging slash at Crowley’s blade*
On contact, the lightsaber fizzles out, and cracks in two*
“Damnit Dad!”
Crowley is sucker punched, and tossed back into the void of space*
“Wait...this is Had Abbadon! Why didn’t anyone tell me this?!? Let’s see how this goes.”
Crowley turns himself horizontally towards the planet, with his feet pointing to his father, and jumps down, propelling himself with large, black wings*
His father takes Crowley’s feet right in his chest, and is launched into the planet*
“Trinity you should really get out of here now!!!”
The dreadnought responds coolly, “Not without you Lord Crowley.”
“Damnit! Stop being so stubborn and get back there already! That’s a direct order!!!”
“Understood, Lord Crowley.”
The dreadnought fires up its engines, and prepares to jump to Hell with Crowley watching*
As Crowley watches the dreadnought disappear into hyperspace, Satan comes up behind Crowley, and buries a colossal blade the color of tarnished silver in his back.
As Crowley gasps for the last time in this system, he mutters, “Remember Dad...Devils Die Twice...”
As Satan removes the blade, now covered in molten magma, Crowley explodes in a tremendous shockwave of energy, slamming Dear old Dad into the void of space, and shattering Had Abbadon into space wreckage.
If Crowley could listen, as Satan plummeted into the abyss, he would have heard, “YOU DESTROYED MY HOME, I’LL BE COMING FOR YOURS!!!”
TO BE CONTINUED...
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Hm. I distinctly feel I failed at my job.