Greetings to all who hear this. Brotherhood, Sheriffs, hell maybe even toaster.
Now that I’ve spent some time infect all your devices, I think it’s time I make my move.
As you listen to this message, my army finishes its preparations. Thanks to Toaster and Lee’s little war I’ve got my hands on some flood infester forms. The raid on the speaker’s vault has given me multiple samples to work with. All I needed was time, and now it’s passed.
With my most recent move, I’ve taken multiple of your devices. Thank you for the S.I.V.A., the nuclear warheads, the new drones, and of course, access to the sheriff departments systems. I’ve used all my information gathered from the sheriff department’s files on each of you to upgrade myself and my troops.
You have one week before I march on the city of offtopic. Good luck.
*End Transmission*
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"problem." D***** what is it this time. "Reports of malware from the monitoring station, sir, everything has been infected." Severity? "Mass breaches and information theft, sir." D*****, remind me to have a word with Lee about better security software.
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Alright. We can just [b]not[/b] do this, or, we're going to kill ya. Your choice.
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NO! Not my Gramophone!
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I mean, I guess.
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Hah! Doubtful! I have a bolter. Your logic and plans are flawed in every sense of the word! Don’t make me get my Heavy Flamer too! [spoiler]Yes, I’m a Warhammer nerd now. It’s just too good for ridiculous memes [/spoiler]
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I'm not very big on technology but I do have a very flexible arsenal at my disposal. [spoiler]If you're curious about my character, mine is a wanderer that tends to collect weapons from memorable locations he encountered in his travels.[/spoiler]
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Stop this gay RP
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A week you say? Alrighty then, lemme do some maths! With Animate Dead, I can use all my 3rd, 4th, and 5th level spell slots (Of which I have 3 of each) to raise 27 Zombies or Skeletons per Long Rest, which for me as an Eladrin is only 4 hours of meditation! So I can raise 162 Zombies a day for a grand total of 1134 after the week...ehhh, it's a start. With my higher level spell slots (of which I only get 1 of each per Long Rest) I can use Create Undead to make 7 Ghouls and 5 Wights every 4 hours! Now this spell is a bit more complex as I can only cast it at night, so assuming "night" is between 6pm and 6am, I'd only be able to make 147 Ghouls and 105 Wights. However! I've recently aquired Auriel's Bow! I can use it and my Vampiric blood to... Long story short I can shoot the sun to create an unnatural Eclipse. I'd say it counts! So I can create 294 Ghouls and 210 Wights! I'm sure the people of Offtopic would understand. Now I just need to...aquire...that many corpses... Ugh. I hate getting my hands dirty.
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And this is why you study ALL the universe has to offer. Not just technology but also magic
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[i]Malware uprising[/i], interesting. Shall we play a game?
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[shit.]
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[quote]You have one week before I march on the city of offtopic.[/quote] There isn’t much of the city left lol
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Shit... *Lee goes to the breaker in the sheriff's department and slams the off switch quickly*
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Dang it. It skipped over half of my song...
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Lord Dagoth would rather you not do that, he has an interest in the odd fellows of Offtopic. If the Sixth House has to, we will send the Akulakhan to protect them.
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Edited by Pyrus: 7/10/2019 1:02:17 PMOh -blam!- Can we talk about this Virus? Please? You hacked all of my arcade machines in my pub.
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So we gotta deal with Phantoms, the eclipse, Virus, and the deep.... What next....?
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Well this is awkward. Could we talk about this quickly in pm’s? [i]the Conflagration will consume you [/i]
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Oh darn. Do I have to kill you now?
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[i]*laughs*[/i] An easy kill!
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I’m ready.
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Sorry, Phantoms beat you to it.
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Cool story bro, we have gun-swords.
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*Laughs in Norton Antivirus*
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... This could be fun... [spoiler]not included in the DLC[/spoiler]