True story and long. If you want to read it, click the spoiler. [spoiler]This happened in the late 80's, maybe early 90's. My buddy and I were about 13 or 14 and we had earned money mowing the neighbor lady's yard. We got permission from our folks to walk down the road to the gas station and get a soda and an ice cream. As we are walking back, this old dude stops and offers us a ride, does the whole, "I know your dad" routine to my buddy. My buddy starts to get in and the guy starts moving all these old ass porn magazines off the front seat. I happen to notice that the floorboard in the back is covered in more of these magazines, like literally all the way up to the seat. He starts telling us that he needs our help to move a few things and he will pay us each $5 and we can look at all the magazines we want, even take 1 home with us. If we want, he will drive us by the house to make sure it is ok with his dad first, but he is sure he will not mind, since they work together and his dad said he should ask us to help him. I ask my buddy if he knows the guy and he says he thinks he has seen him give his dad a ride home from work before, because the old Ford LTD looks familiar. So we jump in and go off to this dude's house. We get there and the house has even more of these old ass porn magazines piled all over the place. He walks us back to the back room and tells us he needs us what to move and where. Now right before he starts, he tells us that if we want to take off our shirts to keep them clean, it is ok, since we are alone. It is at this point the creep meter starts to actually decide to work. We say nah, we do want to get sweat on any of his stuff. As we are moving stuff, we start to realize he is staring at us, very intently. Suddenly he starts asking us about our girlfriends, are we virgins, have we ever made out with a girl, etc. Normally, we this point we would have started bragging about the millions of babes we have bedded and the usual bullshit. We just keep quiet and stick to yes and no answers. Next he asks if we have ever made out with each other and of course, we quickly puff up and tell him we are not gay and that is sick (it was a different time back then). This old perv starts telling us to take our pants off or he will tell everyone we are little queers. We were scared shitless, this old guy was scary looking as all hell, but he did not realize we both had knives on us. So as he is throwing insults and threats at us, as well as telling us what he is going to do to us, he is walking towards us. We pop out our pocket knives and start slashing at him. He screams and backs off and we run for the door. I do not think we actually cut him and I am amazed we did not cut each other. We ran and ran, no idea where we were and scared out of our minds. Hiding from any big boat of a car, until we saw a cop and where we were from, you did NOT talk to the cops, but we did that day. They never found the guy though.[/spoiler]