Either the OP is on hard drugs, or someone really has hacked his account. Either way, the bit about Canada is gold: [quote]"Canada, known more commonly as "The One Place Nothing Interesting Ever Happens" is an anomaly in the fabric of space time. The Prophets call it a "Keystone Dissonance", which is a fancy way of saying it is a nexus point of innumerable causal chains. Within any normal causal chain (reality as perceived from inside that reality) interesting and uninteresting events are constantly happening in equal measure. Think of a single reality as a current of water" here Randal stopped while talking, pulled down his pants and took a piss in the middle of the trail. While producing his own current of water he went on: "and imagine that current in an ocean, alongside hundreds of other currents. The ocean is the multi-verse. Canada is an eddy, or swirl in the currents of reality, where anything and everything uninteresting gathers. Its like when you take a piss in the toilet" here he shook his sizable manhood vigorously, adding apologetically "sorry, m'lady. No toilet paper ya know..." and resumed hiking: "and your piss is really yellow and makes all kinda foamy bubbles. In the case of the universe, those bubbles represent anything and everything that is uninteresting. When you flush the toilet what happens? Those bubbles all swill together into one big bubbly mountain and get sucked away with the piss. Now, its not a perfect example cuz Canada is like a swirl that never gets sucked away. But like the toilet, it collects uninteresting things. Of course, I learned all this in college. Never actually seen a real toilet before. Dont have em' on this world." I could only think about Canada, and how his explanation was stupid because of course interesting things existed there. Randal frowned and answered my thoughts: "Name one thing that was interesting and that came out of Canada! Justin Bieber? No. He was a 12 year old Twat that posted an uninteresting You Tube video, and got noticed by a bunch of uninteresting girls." I couldn't argue with Randal's logic. He went on: "Sometimes something interesting ends up in Canada by chance, like Tim Hortons. But the second it ends up there it becomes uninteresting. How often do you hear about Tim Hortons? How many Tim Hortons do you see in America or anywhere else for that matter? None. Also, in even rarer cases something uninteresting finds its way out of Canada and ends up being interesting again. Like snow. Snow comes from northern Canada and is really interesting if it ends up in Florida. But how often does that happen? So you see my point? Canada is by its very relation to the fundamental fabric of the universe what we call "uninteresting". It is: The One Place Nothing Interesting Ever Happens." I couldn't argue. Everything Randal said made sense. But I still wondered what it had to do with existence. Randal clarified: "It has been this way since eternity. But due to forces too complex to understand, the concentration of uninteresting things has been steadily increasing throughout the multiverse. Canada is like the damn holding back all that boredom, apathy, and tedium. Imagine what reality would look like if that damn broke, and the most interesting things in life (like silly puddy and science) became less fascinating than the Vancouver DMV?" The thought made me sick. "That is why Lord Tesla left you like he did, m'lady. If something interesting has happened from inside Canada, then forces are at work which could destabilize the Anomaly and destroy the damn that protects us all. Would you want Lord Tesla to return to us as a Toronto insurance salesmen? Do you know of any interesting insurance salesmen from Toronto? He is going into the heart of indifference to keep the wonder of the universe alive..."[/quote] https://www.bungie.net/en/Forums/Post/241171442?sort=0&page=0