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Edited by dr obvious2535: 8/12/2017 5:21:39 AM
2

Have You Heard of çøøńmäñ?

It started as a normal day on my road trip. Parents arguing over navigation and sisters fighting over which "dragonvale" dragon is better, me staring at the rolling cornfields of Iowa, wondering when I can get away from this monstrosity of a trip. Fast forward 5 painful hours later, I'm sitting in the hotel room bed, flipping a silver coin up in the air, when the reflection of the only working light bulb catches the coin, flashing silver, and I hear a hissing noise as I look over and see 4 coons instead of the usual motley assortment of my so called "family". They yell "SHINY!" as they launch into the air, lunging at the space my coin was a few seconds earlier. I catch the coin and stare down 4 coons in their beady red eyes. I thought I could fight them. I was wrong. The next few minutes flew by in a whirl of fur and teeth. Just as I thought I was a goner, a broom wielding goatee wearing American beating the coons away with a broom. After he captured all of them, I looked down at my coin, hoping this was a dream. I heard a hiss as I felt a coon who had ecscaped the brawl launch at my hand, biting down at it. Conman tried to save me, but all too soon felt my self shrink, everything turning a rosy shade of red. I looked down at my pawed feet and it dawned on me. I was a coon. The last 5 seconds of my life weren't particularly heroic. I ran around in circles as Coonman asked "Have you tried Xbox.com?" bringing his broom on my furry head. Just when you think you're safe, just when you've made it, beware the coons bite and hope coonman doesnt fail you as he failed me. Coonman shows no mercy to coons.

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