My name is not important...

[b]Name:[/b] Gay Shit [b]Age:[/b] 8 [b]Height:[/b] about six inches deep in your mom [b]Weight:[/b]a savage $560mil dollar pounds [b]Background:[/b] arrested for sexual confusion, confessing to ur mom gay, and being black in a white neighborhood [b]Ally:[/b] my dick [b]Rival:[/b] UTIs and STDs [b]Superpowers[/b]: able to grow my dick with my mind

Name: Northern Lights Age: 8 months Height: 0.3 in Weight: 20g Background: Stashed away in a tube sock inside your underwear drawer Allies: Rolling papers, gravity bongs, pipes made from socket-wrench bits and vitamin water bottles, rebellious teenagers, slumber parties, the woods, late night adventures Rivals: Agents of the State, your parents Superpowers: Glistening with prestigious crystals underneath that lamp on your desk and being "stick-icky", slappin' you silly upside your dome piece

Name: TriBot1000 Age: 437 Height: 7” 4’ Powers: striker Titan [spoiler]don’t kill me please [/spoiler] Background: an exo who is really cool and stuff Ally: lord salad bar Enemy: Elmo

Name: Jeff aka The Humpday Hero Age: Unknown Height: 6ft Weight: 170 Background: Born in the northern reaches of Saskatchewan during an unusual formation of the aurora borealis exactly at noon on Wednesday, The Humpday Hero was infused with strange other-worldly powers Ally: Deanna Jones, meteorologist Rival: Quasi-Moto X, a motocross riding bro that tried jumping his motorcycle over a chemical plant to impress some cheerleaders that he didn't know were traps. The stunt went horribly wrong, and the chemicals reacted to the moonlight, swelling his trapezoidal muscles to gargantuan proportions, and making the traps so impressed that they are now deranged in their loyalty to him. Superpowers: The Humpday Hero can drink and store an immense amount of water in his back-hump, going months without drinking. On Wednesday afternoons, he can levitate in the air to a maximum height of 78 feet, and float in the same direction, and at the same speed of, the wind. He can sense when people are dying of thirst, and makes it his mission to bring them water. Regurgitating it from his water-storing hump, he has saved several lives. He uses a walkie talkie to stay in touch with meteorologist Deanna Jones, as she informs him of prevailing winds to help him float and maneuver to his intended destinations. To fund her private meteorological array, and support the intrepid humped hero, she starts in a series of adult films: "In Deanna Jones" Six and a half days a week, Jeff lives a mild mannered life as a hump-backed accountant, but Wednesday afternoons, he dons his Dromedary suit with baggy arms and loose parachute pants, and floats around the area of greater Los Angeles, helping those with insane thirst. Quasi-Moto X hates the Humpday Hero, because the accident that caused his own trapezoidals to swell into monstrous muscles, making him look like a hunchback, could have been prevented, in his opinion, if he had been properly hydrated. "If only the Humpday Hero were able to have hydrated me on a Thursday morning in the valley, bro, I totally woulda pulled off that sick jump!" But now, with his supernatural attractiveness to traps, Quasi-Moto X remains ever thirsty for a real woman, and blames Humpday Hero for being stuck with only traps at his side. He uses his minions, "The Dickoys" as he calls them, led by Pitfall Hairy, to lure Humpday Hero by making men thirsty whenever they can, and they thwart the efforts of Humpday Hero at every turn. It's an epic, eternal struggle for hydration, preservation of our bodily fluids, and a moist way of life for all Los Angelinos.

Edit: The background may be too long. Alright, here goes nothing. [b]Name:[/b] Mog. [b]Age:[/b] 9. [b]Height:[/b] 50 cm. [b]Weight:[/b] 25 kilos. [b]Background:[/b] I was born and raised in a tiny little village, with only a handful of Moogles in the Wildlands. I'm not much of a fighter, in fact I've never thrown a single punch! One day, my village got attacked by a dark force, they sucked all the positive energy out of every Moogle, and left them with despair. I was out that day, scouring for food. But I saw that negative energy in the distance. It frightened me, I could only imagine what was going on. I rushed back to the village, and on the way back, I encountered a Pixie, which granted me a magic wand. It looks like a watch on the top, with a tiny space to insert an item. I didn't know what I could insert into it, but I had this feeling that whatever it is, it's something significant. When I got back to the village, all the Moogles laid down, unable to move. My heart was filled with sadness. Then I took a glance at the dark force, and said "How dare you, enter my home, causing darkness and despair. I will not allow it!". My heart started to fill with light, and a charm emerged from my body. "The shape", I said. "It's the exact same shape that's on my wand!". I quickly inserted the charm into my wand, and it not only transformed into a giant staff of light, but my body went through a transformation as well. Light covered my body, and gave me a full suit of armor. "They're a perfect fit", I said, in a confusing voice. The Pixie came to me, and said "Looks like you've been chosen". "Chosen for what?" I said. "Chosen to protect this world from the dark king, known as King Mercenarie". "King Mercenarie? Who's that?" I said. "I'm not certain either. He just emerged out of nowhere and started to fill my world with this negative energy, it took over the lives of my people, and transformed them into dark creatures, whos only purpose is to cause chaos and despair." The Pixie said with a sad look on her face. I stare at the darkness, with a mean look on my face. "Alright, that does it! Be prepared to get knocked back to whence you came from!" I said. I took my staff in one hand and charged forward, hitting the creature from every possible angle. But I was too late, because while I had this lengthy dialog, the Moogles hearts fully transformed into these dark creatures. "No!" I said, with my heart filled with sadness. Just in my final moments before they all attack me at the same time. Another charm emerged from my body. I gathered all my strength inserted the charm in my staff, and yelled "SPARKLE SUN!" A powerful explosion launched from my staff and hit every creature. The creatures got purified and the hearts of the lost Moogles got restored. I now know who my enemy is... KING MERCENARIE! I'M COMING FOR YOU! [b]Ally:[/b] A Pixie named Claire. [b]Rival:[/b] King Mercenarie. [b]Superpowers:[/b] Glitter powers (Glitter Light). [spoiler][b][i][u]KUPO!!!™[/u][/i][/b][/spoiler] [spoiler][b][i][u]You have been touched by a Moogle.™[/u][/i][/b][/spoiler]