As you may have noticed from our absence, we at Startec Labs have been off doing top secret science stuff. Which we can’t really tell you about because it probably involves Aliens, even though it totally doesn’t! *wink* So we thought we would catch up with some letters from our fans… Suzanne from Holland Writes: [quote]“Dear Cbrstar, You don’t call, you don’t write, but worse off you completely ignore little Luuk. YOU OWE ME CHILD SUPPORT YOU DEAT BEAT &%$#@!!![/quote] [b]*Gulp* Err… This is one of the few instances that having a time portal to warn your younger self comes in handy. Am I right folks? Ha, ha. Next question.”[/b] [quote]“Jonathan from Florida writes: I’d like to know what’s your greatest weakness, and where do see yourself in five years?”[/quote] [b]What is this a job interview? Seesh!... Greatest weakness? Hmm well I’d have to say lack of government funding. Where do I see myself in five years? Driving a Porsche with a supermodel...Just kidding! In five year were totally getting invaded by the Cettratii from Alpha ceti 9. …Oh wait make sure we censor that last part out. [/b] [b]Ok one last question.[/b] [quote]“Jason from NY writes: I believe I totally know where your secret base is, but I don’t want to expose it to the world in this letter. Could you write me back with the address so I can confirm I’m right? “[/quote] [b]Sure it’s at 172 WAIT A MINUTE!...Nice try![/b] Now for our translation. [quote]“This week at Bungie we tuned the Sandbox.”[/quote] [b]*Translation*: [/b]Tuned sounds so much better then Nerf. But the sad thing is after 3 years were still calling this a “Sandbox” kind of makes it sound like we don’t know what we’re doing. [quote]“The long-awaited Hotfix 2.5.0.2 arrived Tuesday morning and shook things up”[/quote] [b]*Translation*[/b] The no one asked for Nerf-fest is here, enjoy suckers! [quote]“With the update out in the wild, we’ve been roaming the Internet in search of the community’s reactions to the changes”[/quote] [b]*Translation*[/b] “Were trying to gauge how many of you are still playing by the number of complaints we receive” [quote]“As it always is, the response has been violently mixed.”[/quote] [b]*Translation*:[/b] As usual 9/10 of you hate it, the other is either a bungie employee, or wishes they was one! [quote]“In Destiny, we fight for our lives with energy and ballistics but changing the way all that works is the most dangerous game”[/quote] [b]*Translation*:[/b] With the latest nerf’s even level 5 dregs are now dangerous! You’re welcome. [quote]“Some players are loving the way the update feels. Others like a lot about the update but have some specific criticisms of what could be better. Then there is the crowd who thinks [Censored].”[/quote] [b]*Translation*:[/b] The “Censored” bit is actually…People who dropped Destiny and bought other games! OH NOO! [quote]“We respect everyone’s opinion and we realize that change is always hard. We want to know what you think now that you have the controller in your hands and are adapting to the new hotness. Our #Feedback forum is open for business and we have a thread dedicated to collecting things specific to the 2.5.0.2 Hotfix.”[/quote] [b]*Translation*:[/b] We say that we “respect” your opinion, but this is the 20th time we nerfed this game into ground, and this time we didn’t even promise any new content down the road. GG Noobs! Can you say #Stockholm syndrome! [quote]“So, if you haven’t yet, get out there and fire off a few shots, tell us what you think.”[/quote] [b]*Translation*:[/b] Please, please come back to us even though we have nothing new to offer PLEASE! [quote]“In a few weeks, Spring will be in the air. We’re planning to leave the shelter and security of our studio to get some fresh air, soak up some sunshine, and maybe even meet you. These will be strictly social calls for us, not reveals. We’re hitting the road to move among the community.”[/quote] [b]*Translation*:[/b] We’re going to Comic Con, and we’re not announcing any new content. Because it’s all about YOU, not because we don’t actually have any new content to hold you out till September. [quote]“First up is Emerald City Comic Con, from March 2-5. The Bungie store will be there along with our partners at WeLoveFine.com with official Destiny gear for sale. Swing by Booth 1001 and check out the selection of apparel, collectibles, and art prints.”[/quote] [b]*Translation*: [/b]Since we don’t have any over hyped and over priced DLC to sell you, why not buy a overpriced shirt instead? [quote]“Next, we’re shipping up to Boston to drop in on PAX East on March 11 and 12. If you’re going to be there too, find us and say hi. We won’t have a booth but we’ll be around. DeeJ really likes those big pretzels from concession stands. Look for us by one of those or just follow us on Twitter for clues on our whereabouts.”[/quote] [b]*Translation*: [/b]We’ve given up attracting any new customers until D2, so why pay for a booth?