Goooood morning to everyone from the US' west coast! It's your favorite news reporter back in action with another fresh news story!
So, here's a little background info: For several months, various forum users, from celebrities to nobodies have been supposedly banned by an anomaly known as the "Bungie Bot." Yes, many forum users believe that a [i]robot[/i] is handing out all the bans on these forums.
And you know what? [b][i]They were right.[/i][/b]
So without further ado, ladies and gentlemen, I present to you:
[b][i][u]Cozmo.[/u][/i][/b]
"But Venom, how can you be sure that Cozmo is the Bungie Bot?! He's a human, not a robot."
Ahhh, but that's where you're not realizing what's underneath that human. Cozmo is not really a human. He's a cyborg, who has been abused by the Destiny community and Bungie in general, and thus, grown a huge hatred for these forums. So he built the and employed a miniature robot that bans people who offend him.
So if you're wondering why you were banned for no reason, you have Cozmo to blame, not poor Stosh.
This is Agent Venom, signing off.
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Sounds like something a synth would say