Unit Log: 01100100 01100101 01100001 01110100 01101000
Super Good Advice
It’s dark around me. I’ve probably passed hands so many times, like some play thing. He asked me something so simple, heh, that dumb ass. Of course I’d keep you company. But I am a weapon first and A.I. second. I can’t move, you, stupid buffoon! You stole after I rather politely asked to be left alone. -blam!-ing thief. You throw me into a backpack and almost skip out of Clovis Bray. I have no idea how the scientists let you in or why you were allowed to leave with me.
The next time I see light you give me to some stranger! I’m in a place called the Tower. Pahanin, you said your name was, I didn’t give two shits when you told me. I was more worried about that Banshee character molesting me and putting me into some weapon outfit instead of a frame or super computer. I AM a smart A.I. for a reason retard! At least when you took me back you didn’t put your hands all over me like Banshee. You asked me if you were real, of course you are.
Scouting the outskirts of the Wall was the first of our assignments. This massive metal barrier was erected to protect the city within. The Russian landscape was more of a winter wasteland. Littered with snow and trees. I wondered where all the other cities were, and the roads with traffic. You told me about the Fallen, how they took this part of the planet in a few months with sheer force of numbers. Too bad they didn’t have Clovis Bray’s defenses. They were like locusts, stripping natural resources and everything they could get their hands on. We ran into a small group of them, Dregs, they roared and charged with electrified daggers. I mowed them down, laughing at their pitiful frailty. But that wasn’t the end. Larger creatures appeared and began to shoot at us. It was interesting how fluid your motions were as you were handling me in this rather large and bulky form. It took some effort on the really big one leading the group but I took him down. For the first time in my existence I felt a chill in my system. A man, if he could be called that, appeared from the shadows. Could have helped, you said. Didn’t feel like it, he responded. The man was a psychopath; emotionless, apathetic, manipulative, cruel. We left in a hurry, but I could see the motion that man made, about to shoot us in the back just because he could.
About two weeks into our mission we got a request to check out the moon. As we flew over the dark rock, it appeared unusually empty. Well at least I thought so until we flew over a ridge revealing a gigantic crater. Alien metal clawed its way up onto the surface of the moon a dark green haze pouring out. Sharp and broken, it was ominous. We landed just outside of what looked like the mouth to hell. We approached cautiously. What met us at the entrance, the door way, was death. They were called the Hive, and were the ugliest mother -blam!-ers I’ve ever seen. Bone and dust, malnourished, voices that would shatter glass and make your ears bleed. There was countless thrall, just rising from the darkness and rushing from the mist. They were primal, instinctual only using their claws. I dropped them as they approached. That’s when they showed up. The Acolytes and Knights. More creatures that wielded unnatural weaponry. The purple energy projectiles and white exploding light took us by surprise when we were flanked. We barely got to cover. I could hear you panting and felt your heartrate increase. You asked again if you were alone, no you dumb ass nothing has changed. I took aim and returned the creatures to dust. Black ash filled the room, floating in the air with a foul odor. The catacombs under the moon and endless tunnels were dark and difficult to navigate. Distant roars and rumblings echoed from the deepest chambers. There was a door we only took a step into before fleeing. Everything inside was darker than black. You looked into the abyss and felt paralyzed. As a machine the chills were familiar to me. A -blam!-ing demon witch spoke from the night. I couldn’t understand but you, you did the smart thing. You didn’t listen you ran. We escaped having only scratched the surface of something much, much larger… or so I thought. He was there. That monster was following us. The grin on his face was unmistakable. You ignored him, but he wouldn’t have it. He took your arm and held his dark cannon to your head. I can fire without you pulling the trigger, and that is exactly what I did. The short burst barely missed his head and he backed off. We quickly transmatted to our ship and broke to orbit. I think both of us were relieved to be away from that fiend.
We escaped to Venus, not on the run, but just tired of the Vanguard. The jungles were surprisingly beautiful. Lush and dense, very green. Insects and creatures abound. I knew of some research that was going on about some things called the Vex. I knew they were machines but I didn’t ask about them. We found a secluded spot and just sat. We enjoyed the soft planet ignorant of everything around us. What a lovely place this is. Are you alone? Of course you aren’t. I’m with you, you’ve never left me. Honestly it’s a -blam!-ing miracle we got this far if you’re questioning your existence. Then again, maybe not. We spent a long time there on Venus. It was nice to escape. It actually made going back to the grind of killing Fallen outside the wall that much more enjoyable.
A very long time. It was like a dream. Two companions adventuring, kicking ass, taking names, just all around being bad assess. Never once did you question if you were alone. We talked countless hours, traveled innumerable miles. Whispers grew of a dark man wandering Earth killing for fun. An outcast, a traitor, and an exile. We were in agreement, that monster terrified the crap out of us more than anything. Mars was the farthest planet we could escape to. And so we took our leave. We didn’t even want the chance of running into that man on Earth.
Mars is not how I remember it. It seems barren now. Almost empty. But you said we are on the far side, away from civilization so that makes sense. Night cast a dark shadow over the planet. We took some materials and created a blazing fire in the wastes. Phobos proved an excellent moon. You started with stories, such wonderful stories. I remember in vivid detail everything we had done. I loved recounting the best ones. We once took down a Skiff by killing the Barron and joy riding the ship around until it eventually crashed. Or the one where we out ran a band of pikes patrolling the wall.
(CRACK)
Pahanin NO!
(Audible Laughter)
Pick me up! Unleash my fury on that man! No!
(Audible laughter)
You’re not alone! You have never been alone with me! Please don’t let this -blam!-ing ass hole win!
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Selfish bump