Meanwhile other games run seamlessly without having to mess about with everything...
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Destiny relies on non standard ports being open, while games like titanfall, blops3 and bf4 all run over standard ports that PSN and XBL already require to be open for the services to work. All you can do is look at your set up and make it the best you can. Mostly it will be other peoples bad network setups that you need to deal with. While I agree that dedicated servers would go a long way to fixing PvP issues like lag. cheating and network manipulation, right now thats not what we have got. If everyone did the bare minimum, like fixed IP and open the correct ports for the game, then everyones experience would improve. of cousre its an online game and lag will occur at times, and there is nothing you can do when matchmaking puts you against a 6 man team from the north pole.
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They need to sort their shit out it's frankly a mess at their end.