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Edited by Nephy: 6/20/2016 3:29:04 AM
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Nephy

Roast me

Make anything up, roast me, I need to feel bad. [u]Top five roasts:[/u] [b]An Traffic Cone Agent Hel Ines TopDifficulty DocSawBones CaptainWu[/b] Edit: I wanted to make it top five now because this thread got a lot more attention than I thought. Edit: Jeez, really putting this thread up there. A lot of your guy's roasts are really good and don't feel like you didn't do a good job making the top 5, I appreciate the effort.
English
#Offtopic #roast

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  • Edited by Toxic waffle: 6/22/2016 7:28:09 AM
    No thanks im not [b]THAT[/b] hungry.

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  • That would require effort, an effort you aren't worth.

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  • I don't have any matches.

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  • I wouldn't even take the time to open you up, harvest your organs, and display you to the public. [spoiler]wait...that's technically a compliment [/spoiler]

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  • I wanted to roast you but I lost interest [spoiler]sort of like your parents lost interest in raising you[/spoiler]

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  • We only roast humans, not cancer.

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  • "Queer" is spelled with a R at the end, not an N you idiot.

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  • I would roast you, but cows are sacred in my country.

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    • You're hair looks sun damaged.

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    • What the -blam!- did you just -blam!-ing say about me, you little casul? I’ll have you know I ranked top of my covenant in the Sunbros, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Ornstein and Smough, and I have over 300 slotted sunlight spears. I am trained in spamming Wrath of the Gods and I have the highest poise in the entire US server. You are nothing to me but just another dexfag. I will wipe you the -blam!- out with backstabs the likes of which has never been seen before in Lordran, mark my -blam!-ing words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me after getting rekt in a duel? Think again, kiddo. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across Lordran and your summon sign is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, casul. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your humanity(stat). You’re -blam!-ing rekt, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my +5 chaos zwei. Not only am I extensively trained in stunlocking, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the Sunbros and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of my world, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” emote was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your -blam!-ing buttons. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. Git gud, casul.

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      1 Reply
      • You are seeking so much attention that you are [i]asking[/i] people to roast you so you could maybe get popular on some cancerous website or app like vine or snapchat, like all the little brats. You also had the nerve to call yourself queen, showing you are a rich spoiled piece of bitching shit, and most likely a feminazi. Speaking of feminazis, you probably would like to see me burn and give up all my rights so you could have [i]more[/i] rights, none of which you need, because rights are equal, but people are sexist, but, sadly, you are so blind that you can't see the clear truth. And your glasses probably are covered in shit from being in your mess of hair. And speaking of shit, you probably were treated like it, and now your soul is so corrupt and shitty that you feed off of insults and roasts. In conclusion, you are a desperate, bratty, blind, ugly feminazi who loves cancer and feeding off of hatred and anger. You are the definition of a shitty person who was supposed to be on one of those planes that crashed into the twin towers, but you decided that beating up little children and old people and burning the pile of bodies to make a satanic ritual, but Satan was so attracted by how terrible your personality is, you were dragged into hell, and now enjoy feeding on souls and watching people suffer eternally, as you cry with joy. You are that shitty. You are a desperate, evil, bullying, satanic, [spoiler]to be continued...[/spoiler]

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        12 Replies
        • I would, but being a quadriplegic Muslim blind deaf midget with parents isn't that roastable.

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        • *Roasted*

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        • Sounds delicious. I'll slow roast you over a controlled fire that burns at 600 degrees. I'll use my fine assortment of spices and rubs to bring out the flavor. To compliment the dish I shall have lamb liver and whatever fine wine of your choosing. Thank you for letting me roast you.

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        • 1
          mr. jesus doesn't like cannibals.

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        • I bet u kiss guys fgt ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° )

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          • What, was Starbucks closed?

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          • R3kt

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          • You're a bitch ass catfish. Queen? Please more like gay queen. A queen seeking the attention of unknowing men believing you to be a woman. Like Sarah the Italian, you're just some grease ball queen pounding down the 8 buck chicken fingers with a side of man-onnaise. Leading on the thirsty pre-pubescent betas that pollute this forum. You may be a man, pretending to be a woman, but you never will be until you go full Bruce Jenner. And even then in the eyes of Jehovah you're still a man. A sinful, broken man with a empty soul and lifeless spirit. Finding cumfort in the waves of thirty boys you catfish in #offtopic

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            • I'd insult you, but cows are sacred to me.

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              • You're probably a vegan

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                • You're a failed abortion whose birth certificate is an apology from the condom factory.

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                • If I were Adolf Hitler and you were a Jew, I wouldn't burn you alive in my oven. [spoiler]if I get banned for this I'll do the Amanda Todd challenge.[/spoiler] [spoiler]obligatory inb4ban[/spoiler] [spoiler]inb4ban[/spoiler]

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                • Your more desperate for attention then Ben Carson at a gop debate.

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                • You are not a girl.

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                  • Give me something to work with.

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