So I have a concern I would like to express.
Both my girlfriend and I are avid Destiny players. We both love raiding and doing POE and all of it. We both love PvE and PvP.
My concern comes in this, we do have a group that will do all of these things with us. But as it stands all of us have jobs and/or school. So sometimes it is difficult to get all of us together.
So what my girlfriend and I do is get a team of randoms.
Why is it that just because she is a woman that plays games she gets automatic passes into every group there is. Yet I have to pass some sort of test. We will even ask for groups with room for two for both of us. And as soon as they find out she is a woman they will invite her anyway and tell her to ditch me.
I have even had groups hit on her while I am in the chat. She is an amazing woman and tells them to stop or we are both leaving.
Most of the time we have to end up leaving because they wont stop.
I have even heard a guys girl yell at him to stop or she would break up with him.
Just because she is a woman she gets treated like a slut from multiple other people.
Why is this a thing.
When did disrespect become the common thing.
Edit: Thanks for the responses guys. I also have an experience to add that I forgot to mention on here. I have one female character which is my warlock. Well while on my warlock and with my girlfriend, A random guy at the tower decided to try and add us both. And as he put it he thought he it the jackpot. Like wtf is wrong with people that is so wrong and disrespectful it isn't even funny.
Edit: OK. To say for the record the reason I said sexism is the derogatory statements made because of her gender.
attitudes or behavior based on traditional stereotypes of gender roles.
This is the definition of sexism as taken from dictionary.com. those fall under sexism. if you are going to try and bash me for just voicing a concern, at least get your facts straight before you do.
Edit: Yes i Know all woman get hit on. That's the nature of males. I am talking about the way it is being done. Plain out disrespect in the things being said. I wonder if some of these things they said to a woman if they would ever dream to ever say them in person, or better yet in front of someone else.
Edit: This is just voicing a concern. Thinking out loud. Asking a question. Whatever you want to call it.
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Tits or gtfo
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Can you stop starting sentences with like.
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Maturity. You're playing a game rated T. Some of us are mature, and don't care. The rest are kids, or man-children. I play with men and women. I don't care. I play for fun. I have 2 people in my clan that are together. I met her first, then he started playing. I say the same things now, that I did back then.
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The unfortunate fact is people continue to hide behind the fact on a game they are pretty close to faceless, they don't see the possibility of consequences behind whatever action they take. Personally if you report a characters account the previous 20 minutes of chat should be saved and investigated, if that person is being sexist racist or anything similar a time senstive ban on their ability to chat within the game/party chat should be removed, repeat offenders will have longer standing/perm bans. Treating anyone with disrespect should not be tolerated. girls playing computer games is obviously less common than lads but that doesn't mean they should be treated differently.
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Hi there. My girlfriend is a gamer, and regularly streams on twitch. So believe me, I know what you are talking about. I have sat in her twitch chat and seen guys come in and hit on her right in front of me. There is something wrong with a larger part of this younger generation of boys. I cannot call then men in good conscience, because they certainly do not act like men. Instead they act like entitled little creepers who believe that they "deserve" the attention of any woman that they decide they like. It's wrong. It's also why women are so paranoid and afraid of so many men! They have been given very good reason to be. This only changes be doing what you're doing. Calling attention to unacceptable behavior, and trying to show them the proper way to act. I promise you kids, if you want the attention of someone, listen to them. Respect them. Pay attention to them, not what you want from them.
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Entirly different from my experiance, i don´t get invited to any raid at all even tho i try many times using differnt Destiny communities :(
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You're asking why men react to women with such fervor. Someone hasn't been studying their human instinct and social psychology books... well, I haven't either. To make it simple, many men see each female as a possibility and when they see an opportunity, they take it. Such obviously vulgar and socially inept attitudes may be due to an increase in pressure on them. Social anxiety, a need to boost self-confidence and the pure rarity of active females in online gaming (meaning fewer chances for them) may bring out the more primitive instincts. Other factors that attribute to this lack of self-control and respect may be: a poor upbringing, poor self-image, misogynist views, and the general culture on the Internet regarding women's place in the video gaming world. Personally, I'm attracted to women who can kick my ass, but that's just me. P.S. If someone who actually studies this would like to correct me, please go right ahead. I base all my findings on my years on the Internet and in various social spaces.
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https://www.penny-arcade.com/comic
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Sadly, I know how this is. With a former account, I have been chased around in the Divide by two guys shooting at me while I was on patrol. Another time one guy tired to friend request then started killing everything in the section of Venus I was in. I made a not gender specific account name and don't wave at people sometimes if they wave at me or just leave when a guy starts killing everything. The Destiny world is a mirror of the real one. Join a clan OP. My clan is pretty good -Caydes cavalry.
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My group of friends includes three couples and I've never seen anything like that. Also, we don't play with squeakers, so that may be why.
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The other members can sense you're a beta cuck.
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Welcome to the WWW
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I understand what you mean. My wife and I love playing Destiny, but when we go raiding with either randoms or a friend who's bringing randoms, she gets completely ignored when it comes to direction. Yes, she's a woman, and she knows her shit, too. She'll speak up about a strategy in raiding or something to be aware of and it'll often get ignored. The moment I speak up, everyone pipes the -blam!- down and listens, ESPECIALLY if its in her defense. I'm not getting into the whole sexism debate with my comment. That being said, take women -blam!-ing seriously, people. There are a handful of men and women that are morons, sure, but they are few and far inbetween, and mostly underage.
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U my friend need to start/join a clan
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I have raided with several female players the youngest was 16. I still do raids/POE with woman and I have never come across what you describe.
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Simply becuase she is a female and those kids think with their heads (🍆) lol not their brains
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Ive never had a problem playing with anyone but i have seen this done a few times its just a sad community and you have to soldier on =/
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It wouldn't feel the same if you said "carry me Senpai" over the mic. Sorry.
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When I play, they already assume I suck and tell me to leave the game, but no one has ever tried to hit on me maybe because my voice isn't cute haha oh well.
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Because you're playing with random teenagers and people with little or no online friends/social etiquette.
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I've been in the exact same situation as you, like EXACT.... even down to having a female warlock, which is scary... I used to just try to stick with my familiar raiding team as best I could, even with studying accountancy and two thirds of our group being from 3 separate timezones, I found I managed to play the raid at least 3 times a week in order to collect rewards. I'm talking from 5+ month ago now though, my group disbanded and only really been able to play PoE since :P But from the sounds of it, the disrespect is just as bad as ever :/
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Edited by FromNowOn: 5/8/2016 10:20:28 PMThe sexism in the gaming community is REAL and is some of the worst and most toxic due to the inherent anonymity... The internet is bad enough, but it seems the most sexist pigs out there also love video games... That being said, I've only encountered a relatively small amount of sexism. Most guys seem to be pretty polite and courteous. I notice a [i]difference[/i] for sure... But most Guardians out there are pretty cool! :)
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Please dont let a few bad experiences ruin your enjoyment of the game. Ive played plenty of raids with girls and have never once tried hitting on them. Whats the frickin point? Men in society in general tend to get a bad reputation as all sexist just because a few dooches exist. Just let it go over your head or it'll ruin your game.
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Crying in the forums isn't gonna help Quit being a bit*h grow a pair instead
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I get this kind of thing a lot and I'm a man! My character is female and my tag is gender-neutral, for no particular reason. One persistent guy keeps inviting me for a 'steamy session,' usually after smoking some old socks or something. I have repeatedly told him that I am, in fact, a man, not gay, and that most people are unlikely to respond positively to such sophisticated chat as 'I'm going to stick my d**K in your p***y then in your a**, and then you can suck my balls.' He doesn't seem to get that talking to strangers like this is likely to end up in (a) a spell in hospital or (b) in front of a judge. It is kind of annoying but unfortunately, much like these forums, on-line community gaming does attract some socially maladjusted twats that feel protected by the lack of consequences for behaving in such an offensive way.
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I'm pretty sure my girlfriend gets it aswell. When im not in her fire team the randoms that "jump in" is quite funny. The sad part is this often makes her play showing offline so people leave her alone......