It's fun exploring planets together, raiding together, delving into the lore together. I've even bought him one of those Ghost plushes, stress engrams, and some t-shirts. We're even thinking of getting one of those Atheon Mega-Bloks™ so we can recreate our favorite raid. My son even goes as far as to have a fascination with the Purple Ball, which is odd. It almost seems like worship. (Don't tell him I said that, he doesn't like that I disapprove of his faith.) Well, fast forward to a day before his 15th birthday, & I asked my son, "Well my son, what would you like for your birthday?" My son hesitated a moment as my thoughts leapt ahead to a new computer and similar things. However, he is not worthy of PC Master Race & already has a PS4, so unfortunately I'm the father of a console peasant. Finally, he said, `Father, I have everything a boy could wish for, but there is one thing I would really like. I would love to have a Destiny Purple Ball, but as Bungie does not sell those currently for the believers, I'd rather have a purple ping pong ball. It's close enough to the luminescent one." I was rather astonished at this wish, but said, `If it is a purple ping pong ball that you want, a purple ping pong ball you shall have.' And so, the next day, my son was given as his birthday present a purple ping pong ball. He took the ball to his room and the next morning the purple ping pong ball was gone. I was mildly surprised but decided not to say anything. The purple ping pong ball, however, was never seen again. The next year, a day before his 16th birthday, I asked my son what he would like for his birthday. `Father,' replied my son, `I have everything a boy could possibly wish for, but there is one thing I would really, really like. I would love to have a tenpack of purple ping pong balls.' Now I was more surprised than the year before, but I kept my curiosity at bay, for I knew that my son had a right for privacy. I said therefore, `If it is a tenpack of purple ping pong balls that you want, a tenpack of purple ping pong balls you shall have.' And so, the next day, my son was given as his birthday present a tenpack of purple ping pong balls. He took the tenpack of balls to his room and the next morning, not a single ball remained, merely the empty husk of the tenpack. I wondered where ten purple ping pong ball might disappear to, but decided not to say anything. The purple ping pong balls, however, were never seen again. The next year, a day before his 17th birthday, I asked my son what he would like for his birthday. `Father,' said my son to this, `I have everything a boy could wish for, but one thing would make my happiness complete. I would dearly want a carton of purple ping pong balls.' Again, I was beyond surprise, but decided to make sure I had not misheard, in case he wanted Destiny 2: Dinklage Returns instead. `A carton of purple ping pong balls?' `A carton of purple ping pong balls,' my boy confirmed. `I can't understand your fascination with the false god that is the Purple Ball ,' I replied, `but if it is a carton of purple ping pong balls that you want, it is a carton of purple ping pong balls that you shall have.' And so, the next day, he was given as his birthday present a carton of purple ping pong balls. My boy was delighted and took the carton to his room. The next day, miraculously (as if by space magic, even) the purple ping pong balls had all disappeared. `Dearest son,' I inquired, `I must ask now, before we log on to do the Cabals' Deep raid, what do you do with all those purple ping pong balls?' My only son, however, was reluctant to tell me, his only father. `Please humour me, dear father.' The carton of purple ping pong balls, however, was never seen again. The next year, it was clear that my son would get a car, but I felt that, perhaps, my son also had some other wish apart from the obvious. So, one day before his 18th birthday, I asked him whether he had a special wish for his birthday. `Dearest father,' he started, `I have everything a young man could possibly want, but there is one craving in me. I would, more than anything, want a warehouse full of purple ping pong balls.' One of these years, I thought, I should get to the bottom of this. However, I decided to humour my son's wish. At least I had been wise enough to buy shares in a purple ping pong ball factory. The next day, I gave my son the address of the warehouse where all his new purple ping pong balls were stored. He was delighted and decided to spend the next night in the warehouse rather than at home. The following morning, my son stepped out of the warehouse, but it seemed to be empty otherwise. I had a closer look and indeed, apart from empty cardboard boxes, nothing was left inside the warehouse. No purple ping pong balls were left. The following year, one day before my son's 19th birthday, I braced myself for another warehouse of purple ping pong balls. I asked my dearest son what his deepest desire was and I had not been entirely wrong. `Father, you have made me very happy these last years and this year I ask of you a shipload of purple ping pong balls if at all possible.' It was possible, if only because I had by now bought each and every factory of purple ping pong balls in the country, thanks to my generous Twitch donations. Hit me up for paid Trials carries, they're worth it. The next day, I took my son to the harbour and showed him a huge tanker and told him that there were millions, billions, trillions of purple ping pong balls in there. `Father,' my son beamed, `You've made me very happy yet again.' That night, my son spent on board the tanker. The next morning, not a single of the purple ping pong balls could be found, but my son was happy. A few days before his 20th birthday, however, he had a terrible Sparrow accident (kept boosting with the Timebreaker) and was taken to the hospital. I visited my boy in the hospital. `My dear son! Can I bring you anything to make you feel better?' Weakly, he sat up in bed. `Father, dearest father, grant me this wish; just one tenpack of purple ping pong balls.' I held my son's hand tightly, trying my best to stay strong. `Whatever you wish my son, but I have to give you one condition. Even if it may be embarrassing, I must know what you did with all those purple ping pong balls, & why you worship the Purple Ball so much.' `Very well, father, but please indulge me first. I will tell you whatever you wish to know after you have given me the ten purple ping pong balls.' I thought that that was fair enough and the next day I brought my dear son the ten asked-for purple ping pong ball. My only son smiled weakly but seemed too weak to talk. `Son, I leave these purple ping pong balls with you and shall come back tomorrow to ask of you what you have done with all those purple ping pong balls.' My dearest son nodded weakly. The next day, less than surprisingly, no purple ping pong ball could be found in his hospital room. `Now, my dearest son, apple of my eye, treasure of my life, please tell me what you did with all those purple ping pong balls,' I humbly requested. My son nodded and I gripped his hand tighter. `I-' my son started and sat up a bit, swallowing with a dry mouth. `I- I-' Then he died.