You're bitching. You're moaning. You're kicking your stupid legs (unless you don't have any, and you're paralyzed) and you're saying:
[b]Lets boycott Iron Banner.[/b]
But let's face it. You're going to play it. You can't help yourself. You're gonna go do exactly what you've been crying about this last 36 hours as soon as they dropped the update: Login, zone in, [b][u]RIFT.[/u][/b]
And do you want to know why? Because you're a stupid butthole. You want that 320 ghost. Or mark. Or the new IB scout. Maybe you just like shooting people in the face.. But
You're going to play. Just like last time.
And the last time.
And the last time.
You're going to fight through the red bars, the yellow bars, the asses that make [b]you[/b] red bar and yellow bar, and you're going to fight, guardian. You're going to fight because you can't help yourself. You are going to fight because you hope.
You hope [b]this[/b] game won't be full of retards and doorknob humping monkeys. [b]This game[/b] won't be the same as last game. It'll be different [b]this[/b] time. That rank 5 package will have what I need!!
You hope.
And hope.
And you hope.
But you'll be there. See you in rift, guardian!
____________________________________________
Edit 1: Trending! +200 with barely any salt!
Edit 2: apparently there are more than a few salty nerds that think this applies directly to them. So if the shoe fits...I guess?
Edit 3: I'm aware i don't have the stats to back up an MLG gamers crap talking. Won't stop me from blowing your face off with mah Tlaloc.
Edit 4: This was definitely made to incite feelings on both sides. But bring your salt. My choo choo runs on sodium levels and enemy tears!
Edit 5: Always make sure you have your Omaha Potatoe plugged into your router. Also, quick poll: Send everyone on the enemy team a "get REKT" message. Yea or Nay??
Edit 6: 300+ "choo choo!"
Edit 7: 400! Also refer to this handy guide for this weeks Iron Banner: [url=https://www.bungie.net/en/Forum/Post/183412100/0/0] Iron Banner tips!![/url] I realize I am [b][u]not[/u][/b] Ponethepoon, all props to him for that post. Still funny.
Edit 8: 500 posts strong, and the delusion is still REAL!! Get that spark, guardians!
Edit 9: 600 and we've been visited by Nike! Spent a few matches in Rift today just to get a feel for it. Everyone in the lobby had more than 20 kills and it was a slobber-knocker. THIS IS GONNA BE AWESOME!
-
I won't be touching IB, division beta will take me this week. Anyone else doing the same?
-
My hunter I got ib scout last ib from rank 5 package
-
"Because you're a stupid butthole".. I LOL'd at this.. not sure why. I haven't heard "butthole" in a long time. Funny word.. funny guy.. you.. YOU YOU YOU </Deniro>
-
Lol. Look at my recent playtime. You really think I'm going to play it?
-
Unfortunately... this is true... :(
-
But I like rift.....are there really that many that dont?
-
This is pure gold well played sir.
-
I'll be on iron banner, there is no way I'm missing out on awesome rewards! :D
-
I jave the cloak, a 320,316 and 314 ghost shell and a 31/ scout rifle, but I'll still play it to try and get better loot
-
People boycotting Iron Banner? More loot for me then
-
Not me because GTA has stolen my heart. :)
-
Actually the division beta is happening so no ib for me. Or a lot of people I play with for that matter
-
Playing this next months IB will feel like I'm at work because it's filled with children that don't understand why they're there and their parents are just constantly saying "you're okay, you need to calm down" Except in IB there won't be any parents Just screaming children that think their parents are listening to their "pain" [spoiler]plus I have training all next month so I won't really have a chance to begin with[/spoiler]
-
Edited by itsnothin: 1/25/2016 3:56:02 AMDon't like rift, I'll play when ib comes back next month
-
You are going to sniff my bum and like it!
-
Oh, hell, yes.
-
+10 had me at "stupid butthole". Classic name calling is best name calling.
-
I'm hella stoked for rift IB. I Played a couple hours with my buddy the other day and it was unspeakably intense, there weren't too many extremely one sided matches.
-
Game mode doesn't bother me. Last IB had terrible reward drop rates (one before that was quite good). That's why I won't be playing this rift IB.
-
Honestly I havent touched iron banner since I think september. They could give me rank 5 right away and all I had to do was win or loose one game and I would probably still not play it. Even if it was mayhem clash I wouldnt play it. Why would I grind for ugly 280 gear when all my gear is 300 plus. Pretty stupid to be honest
-
I'm going to get the rift, and PUT it in the enemy... [spoiler]rift[/spoiler] ~[i]TheGreatNike[/i]
-
I'll play it, I won't like it. They better not have that same high score bounty/10 kill streak bounty
-
I'll play. I don't really enjoy rift because I struggle with the maps. But I didn't enjoy playing clash before iron banner made me play it either. Now that I've played several hundred more matches I the Playlist I have started to get a little better and enjoy it a little more
-
Nah I'm not playing a game I suck at rift
-
Gays are gay
-