Joined an LFG team for the Oryx CP.
Nothing out of the ordinary upon joining the chat. Mature voices, everyone sounding pretty chilled. Always a good sign. Upon arriving in the arena, the host tells me we're just waiting for our relic runner, who went AFK right before I joined. He's a 311 Titan, but the host assured me he was a decent runner. We were running the 8 and 8 strat, and I was to take plate one.
That's when I hear it. Distant, but still clearly audible.
"[i]Mom! I'll do it after![/i]"
The shrill, obnoxious voice grows in volume as the foul beast gets closer to its mic.
"[i]No! I said I'll do it after![/i]".
A loud scratching sound emanates through the chat as the squeaker's sticky fingers fumble with the headset.
"[i]K guys, I'm back! My Mom said I gotta go soon! So we have to kill Owyx fast! K?[/i]".
My hearts sinks, but I decide to stick it out. After clearing the initial adds, I notice our prepubescent 311 Titan browsing his inventory. Oryx slams the front left plate.
"[i]K guys! I'm changing to the Twilight Gawwison! Just so I can get to the welic faster![/i]".
I hear another fireteam member snicker.
The squeaker and I leap to the first plate. "One's up". It jumps to the first interdimensional platform, activates the exotic chestpiece's evade, gets propelled clear over the boundary wall and falls screaming into the abyss..
*Guardian Down*
"[i]OMG! What the hell! Someone got off their pwate![/i]"
[b]RoseScythe has left the Fireteam[/b]
Is edit: Just felt like sharing a tale with you fellow guardians. A tale of hard choices. Of paths taken. I hope you all enjoyed it. Cheers :)
Knight is run.
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Twilight Garrison for the platforms?
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-blam!-ing squeakers, i remember my days of being a stubborn 12 year old with voice cracks galore online... So bad... thank god for growing up...
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Lmao well written!
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someone with the exsact same name as yours left that fireteam...
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My friend is 10 years old and all his characters are like 316+ he's not annoying or anything but he just has high pitched voice.
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Edited by EMoney012: 1/20/2016 2:16:22 PMHad one last night who said he knew Golgoroth challenge. We assigned him 5th gaze taker...just guess what happened after number 4. He didn't grab it so number 6 took it instead - no big deal. We tell him to take 6 and he actually does. We jump down for extra DPS, ask for a countdown and he can't find the timer shouting, "IT ISNT ON MY SCREEN I DONT HAVE ONE WHERE IS..." ...Guardian down. Golgoroth satisfies his hunger. Call us idiots but we should have known this was going to happen after he screwed up the aura on warpriest and got lost in the maze... I'm all for helping out squeakers but if you happen to be one reading this post here is some advice. The single most important attribute is not what light level you are, not what weapons you have, it's your ability to concentrate on something for 5 minutes...bring that with you and I'm sure there are hundreds of guardians that will help you all day - myself included. Oh and don't ever yell at your mom
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Lol that's like the squeaker that didn't jump out the pit when he was supposed to during Golgoroth one time. Everyone was blown to shit and he was like IT WASN'T ME! To bad he was the only one left alive in the pit ha.
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Beast story bro
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DPJ is not 8 years old though. Or is he...?
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Twilight Gawwison is ovewpowewed
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That was entertaining.
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What up, Rose? Anyways- Squeakers. I never play seriously when I'm on their team. I feel inclined to make them feel stupid by just trolling them until they get angry and boot me from the team.
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Love the dictation in this reenactment. You should be a writer if you aren't already.
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Damn this legitimately had me laughing.
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Edited by Erijian: 1/21/2016 12:58:27 AMI'm convinced that squeakers have their own "squeaker-brand" headset that functions the exact same as any other, except there's no mute button.
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Kill them all [spoiler]realy yes[/spoiler]
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Next time use Gods duct tape Nekid shotty performs http://youtu.be/MOoooEMVUNw
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Edited by Muggs: 1/21/2016 2:23:55 AMI have a squeky voice but im not annoying or obnoxius i take blame wen its my fualt and try to be quiet
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They should make a squeaker lfg. Save us the pain
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It seems that Oryk, father of Croat, summoned one of his repugnant minions into your ranks.
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Not age, attitude...
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I went flawless with two squeakers, was tempted to leave but they were good, a water star was not a good reward for listening to their annoying voices for almost 2 hours
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Why did you change the profile.pictire?
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I wont play with squeakers either. Now hear me out before I get called an ass. I'm 30, if I were to go to the park and play with 10-13 year olds I would end up on a police watch list faster than you can say I don't have time to explain why I don't have time to explain. What I don't understand is why these younger players want to play with the older people.....
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Edited by Nero: 1/20/2016 3:42:26 PMPlease make more. [u][i][b]#KnightIsRun[/b][/i][/u]