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12/9/2015 1:59:02 PM
1
Shhhhh, quit giving away my secrets. Otherwise I'll give you a coal for Christmas. A singular coal, red hot, inside of your- you can put together the rest.
English
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Explain how tf you keep a coal red hot when you fly around at the elevation of Mount Everest
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You know those mini portable coolers? Yeah, I've got heaters like that. It's called magic.
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Well at least the coal will serve as a cauterize for when you try to take a bite of my cookies and I kobe the coal off your stomach into your mouth
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I'd rather use a steak made of your spleen <3
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But then word will spread that SANTA -blam!- A GUY AND COOKED HIS SPLEEN FOR DINNER AFTER A LONG NIGHT OF NAUGHTY GIRL FUN
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Not if nobody hears you scream
