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Edited by BenjyX55: 11/23/2015 12:20:00 AM
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If God is real...

I've been told time and time again that I'm going to hell for not believing in God. If it turns out that you morons are right and God is real, here's the conversation I would have to get out of going to hell. Me: "I'm sorry God, I'm not going to hell because I don't believe in hell. I don't believe in you, either." God: "What do you mean? I'm right in front of you." Me: "I'm sorry, but I don't believe in you. No amount of evidence will convince me otherwise." God: "It doesn't matter what you believe. I'm real. You're talking to me right now." Me: "I'm offended. You need to respect my beliefs, no matter how absurd they are. Even if my opinion goes against all logic and reasoning, it's still my opinion and should get special privileges just for having it." God: "This is ridiculous. Go to hell." Me: "I can't. Hell doesn't exist. You don't exist." God: "Are you retarded?" Me: "I don't believe in you. You aren't real." God: "You can't be serious. I'm right in front of you. It's impossible to deny that I'm real." Me: "Sorry, your 'indisputable facts' go against what I believe, so I'm not listening to you." This is the logic that God's people use, so he'll have to accept it.

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  • Actually, if you're going to Hell, you won't have a chance to talk to God. You won't make a pit-stop and chat it up. You'd simply be taken to Hell (or purgatory until Heaven judges you, depending on which denomination we're talking about here).

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