Be 18
playing pokemon on shitter before school
Bus comes outside
I still havent wiped
Mom yells I have to go
Have horrible poison ivy on crotch
Pour a bunch of cream on my penis, put on my pants and run to the bus
Girl I like sits next to me
asks me if ive ever been kissed
I take out my gameboy
She starts whispering in my ear
I start sweating
I look down
The cream is seeping through my jeans, making it look like i cummed
She notices
I notice
I open my fannie pack to grab some kleenexes
My sphagetti falls out all over
I start sweating more
Realize i forgot to wipe my ass
The entire bus smells like shit and sphagetti
bus gets to school
Try and run to bathroom
teacher catches me
its penis inspection day
my name is alan aardvard
I have to go first
Nurse demands For me to take off my pants
I refuse
She wrestles me down, and gets a magnifying glass real close to my crotch
close my eyes and scream the guile theme at the top of my lungs
She unzips my pants, the smell of spaghetti, cream and shit leaks out
she pukes on my nuts
I get expelled
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