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Edited by Tiber of Astora:
10/8/2015 8:31:18 PM
26
Pseudo-petition to outlaw minivans and the people who drive them.
Minivans make the innocent want to hurt people. They incite violence in peaceful people. When someone has to get home after a long day of work, there's always a minivan struggling to hit 55 after two minutes of accelerating. They make even the nicest people angry. They are of the devil. Only poor people and the mentally retarded drive such a disgraceful vehicle. Who so ever drives a minivan wastes valuable time when accelerating; not only for themselves, but those behind them.
We must outlaw these abominations and the wicked souls who drive them. They must be criminalized.
[spoiler]Long live the six cylinder and up![/spoiler]
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4 RepliesEdited by Rhynerd: 10/9/2015 5:01:57 PM[quote]When someone has to get home after a long day of work, there's always a minivan struggling to hit 55 after two minutes of accelerating.[/quote] As a member of a family that owns a minivan, I must attest that our minivan was owned by the fastest member of the family, and the car matched her with ease. My father, who had been through many a car, of many types, was impressed the speed it got when allowed to (albeit it was most likely in a way you would add "for a minivan" to the end of). The vehicle was a typical Toyota Sienna, a poster child of minivans if I ever saw one. Perhaps the issue is within the drivers? Either way, the minivan is faster than my 4Rhynerd, if you wish to purge based on speed and/or acceleration, then you pose a threat to my vehicle, [i]and I will not lose another Rhynerd so easily.[/i] [b][i]AND IF YOU DARE CALL MY FAMILY POOR AGAIN THEN I WILL DEMAND THAT YOU BE WILLING TO LIVE UP TO THE CONSEQUENCES, EITHER THROUGH PISTOL OR BLADE.[/i][/b]
