It was a stormy day in may, i was playing the level 35 prison of elders and we were fighting Skolas, this was our last attempt... We had exhausted all our heavy ammo synthesis in the previous rounds and and were making one last daring attempt. We had Skolas down to 50% health when i heard a loud thunder strike outside. "NO!" i screamed but it was too late the red and grey bar had appeared at the bottom of my screen. "Attempting to reconnect." It read.
"Get gud scrub"
It thundered all around me, outside and inside the game. Lighting flashed all around my house blinding me, when i regained my vision this is what i saw: "SmoggyPluto has joined your fireteam." I frantically checked my screen and sure enough he was there in our fireteam, 4 in our fireteam... He spawned in with a monstrous roar that turned to a low chuckle...
"not today." he said.
He ran to my unmoving glitching form; my teammates screaming overwhelmed with adds. He spawned a bubble that gave us both weapons and blessing of light. I was astounded but knew that i would not last long enough... I was going to disconnect... When suddenly SmoggyPluto reached through my screen and grabbed the disconnect bar... I couldn't believe what was happening. He grabbed the bar as if it was a stick, pulled it off my screen and loaded it into his Gjallarhorn,
He then jumped into the sky, a quartic jump, 5 JUMPS, he got so high he absorbed the sun and then in one swoop shot the disconnect bar into Skolas tearing him apart into nothing. The wolfpack rounds then proceed to swarm and destroy the mines we were supposed to dismantle
He stayed with us all the way to the treasure room but did not speak. Finally he urinated on the large chest and turned to us and said "become legend gaurdian."
SmoggyPluto has left your fireteam speechless me and my fireteam all opened the pee-stained chest... We all received 3 Gjallarhorns... One void, one arc, and one solar, all already fully maxed
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