I was 8 or 9 when my dad died but he was usually at working from morning till night so I never really got to know him that well or it seemed that way. His death honestly didn't effect me much at all if any. My mom's death this last Christmas though really effected me. My bro, her, and I pretty much stayed together for 33 years. Came home Christmas morning from work and she was asleep. Checked back on her a hour later and she had died in her sleep. She was 72 and in bad health from smoking so it wasn't really unexpected. Sorry about your dad as well. Life is shit sometimes.