I'd venture a guess that you don't go around telling people to -blam!- their mothers when you don't have a screen to hide behind, or that if you do the majority of people let it go because you're fifteen years old. If everything you've said is true, you might be an intelligent individual. If you think that grants you worth, or makes your opinion valuable to anybody but you, you're wrong. Being fifteen means you've never had to take care of yourself. You've presumably never known the fear, loneliness, and pain of addiction. I sincerely hope that you never do. Everything in your life right now, you can afford to take for granted, because you don't actually have to work for anything. It's handed to you. So here you go, attempting to prove how smart you are, to a stranger on the internet, because suddenly just being you isn't enough to impress. While I could do a point-by-point analysis of why your self-aggrandizing diatribe is meaningless to everyone but you, it would essentially feed your ego further to dissect your message, which was the whole purpose of writing it out in the first place. Your IQ proves nothing. Your bronyism proves less than that. Your self-reported physics knowledge is likely bullshit, but also useless in forming human relationships. Being a dick on the internet is easy. Actually being thoughtful, considering other people before you say things, and being willing to admit wrongdoing or at least try to examine a perspective besides your own, that's a task. But you can get away with just being a dick, and it feeds your sense of superiority (which clearly you possess, by the nature of your defense), because you can't defeat irrational insults with rational responses. So what do I think of you? Again, if what you said is true, you're an intelligent person, sure. But I think your casual willingness to be mean-spirited to people you don't know, who are gathering in a virtual space to discuss things that are important to them, outweighs whatever intelligence you have and makes you an unpleasant person to interact with. It would do you well to consider others, and also entertain the notion that you are not better than other people. Complaining that you are downvoted when your "advice" (the pedestal you built for yourself) is irrelevant to the thread you comment in, then being an outright asshole when someone explains that downvote -which didn't need to be explained at all- is confrontational at best, but in reality it's just dickishness. Which no one can prevent. But it's not something people have to put up with either. I feel like I've just wasted my time, because I think you are more interested in defending yourself than examining and discussing.

[quote]Nor are you creative, you're a 12 year old with no ideas of your own so you copy someone's story and try to pass it off as funny. You're lame, be original. Edit; stop or I [i]will[/i] report you [i]all[/i].[/quote]

Nor are you creative, you're a 12 year old with no ideas of your own so you copy someone's story and try to pass it off as funny. You're lame, be original. Edit; stop or I [i]will[/i] report you [i]all[/i].

I hole-hardedly agree, but allow me to play doubles advocate here for a moment. For all intensive purposes I think you are wrong. In an age where false morals are a diamond dozen, true virtues are a blessing in the skies. We often put our false morality on a petal stool like a bunch of pre-Madonnas, but you all seem to be taking something very valuable for granite. So I ask of you to mustard up all the strength you can because it is a doggy dog world out there. Although there is some merit to what you are saying it seems like you have a huge ship on your shoulder. In your argument you seem to throw everything in but the kids Nsync, and even though you are having a feel day with this I am here to bring you back into reality. I have a sick sense when it comes to these types of things. It is almost spooky, because I cannot turn a blonde eye to these glaring flaws in your rhetoric. I have zero taller ants when it comes to people spouting out hate in the name of moral righteousness. You just need to remember what comes around is all around, and when supply and command fails you will be the first to go. Make my words, when you get down to brass stacks it doesn't take rocket appliances to get two birds stoned at once. It's clear who makes the pants in this relationship, and sometimes you just have to swallow your prize and accept the facts. You might have to come to this conclusion through denial and error but I swear on my mother's mating name that when you put the petal to the medal you will pass with flying carpets like it’s a peach of cake.

You're walking in the woods. There's no one around, And your phone is dead. Out of the corner of your eye you spot him, Shia Labeouf. He's following you About 30 feet back. He gets down on all fours and breaks into a sprint. He's gaining on you. Shia Labeouf. You're looking for your car, But you're all turned around. He's almost upon you now And you can see there's blood on his face! My god, there's blood everywhere! Running for your life (From Shia Labeouf.) He's brandishing a knife. (It's Shia Labeouf.) Lurking in the shadows Hollywood superstar Shia Labeouf. Living in the woods, (Shia Labeouf.) Killing for sport, (Shia Labeouf.) Eating all the bodies Actual, cannibal Shia Labeouf. Now it's dark and you seem to have lost him, But you're hopelessly lost yourself. Stranded with a murderer, You creep silently through the underbrush. A-ha! In the distance, A small cottage with a light on. Hope! You move stealthily toward it, But your leg! AH! It's caught in a bear trap! Gnawing off your leg, (Quiet, quiet.) Limping toward the cottage, (Quiet, quiet.) Now you're on the doorstep, Sitting inside, Shia Labeouf. Sharpening an ax, (Shia Labeouf.) But he doesn't hear you enter, (Shia Labeouf.) You're sneaking up behind him. Strangling superstar Shia Labeouf. Fighting for your life with Shia Labeouf, Wrestling a knife from Shia Labeouf, Stab it in his kidney. Safe at last from Shia Labeouf. You limp into the dark woods, Blood oozing from your stump leg. But you have won. You have beaten Shia Labeouf Wait! He isn't dead, Shia surprise! There's a gun to your head. And death in his eyes. But you can do Ju Jitsu. (You can do it) Body slam superstar Shia Labeouf. Legendary fight with Shia Labeouf. Normal Tuesday night for Shia Labeouf. You try to swing an axe at Shia Labeouf. But blood is draining fast from you stump leg. He's dodging every swipe, he parries to the left. You counter to the right, you catch him in the neck. Your chopping of his head now... You have just decapitated Shia Labeouf. His head toppled to the floor, expressionless. You fall to your knees and catch your breath. You are finally safe from Shia Labeouf.

Fedoras

[spoiler] You swine. You vulgar little maggot. You worthless bag of filth. As wesay in Texas, you couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructionsprinted on the heel. You are a canker, an open wound. I would ratherkiss a lawyer than be seen with you. You took your last vacation inthe Islets of Langerhans.You're a putrescent mass, a walking vomit. You are a spineless littleworm deserving nothing but the profoundest contempt. You are a jerk, acad, and a weasel. I take that back; you are a festering pustule on aweasel's rump. Your life is a monument to stupidity. You are a stench,a revulsion, a big suck on a sour lemon.I will never get over the embarrassment of belonging to the samespecies as you. You are a monster, an ogre, a malformity. I barf atthe very thought of you. You have all the appeal of a paper cut.Lepers avoid you. You are vile, worthless, less than nothing. You area weed, a fungus, the dregs of this earth. You are a technicolor yawn.And did I mention that you smell?You are a squeaking rat, a mistake of nature and a heavy-metal bagpipeplayer. You were not born. You were hatched into an unwilling worldthat rejects the likes of you. You didn't crawl out of a normal egg,either, but rather a mutant maggot egg rejected by an evil scientistas being below his low standards. Your alleged parents abandoned youat birth and then died of shame in recognition of what they had doneto an unsuspecting world. They were a bit late.Try to edit your responses of unnecessary material before attemptingto impress us with your insight. The evidence that you are anincompoop will still be available to readers, but they will be ableto access it ever so much more rapidly. If cluelessness were crudeoil, your scalp would be crawling with caribou.You are a thick-headed trog. I have seen skeet with more sense thanyou have. You are a few bricks short of a full load, a few cards shortof a full deck, a few bytes short of a full core dump, and a fewchromosomes short of a full human. Worse than that, you top-post. Godcreated houseflies, cockroaches, maggots, mosquitos, fleas, ticks,slugs, leeches, and intestinal parasites, then he lowered hisstandards and made you. I take it back; God didn't make you. You areSatan's spawn. You are Evil beyond comprehension, half-living in theslough of despair. You are the entropy which will claim us all. Youare a green-nostriled, crossed eyed, hairy-livered inbredtrout-defiler. You make Ebola look good.You are weary, stale, flat and unprofitable. You are grimy, squalid,nasty and profane. You are foul and disgusting. You're a fool, anignoramus. Monkeys look down on you. Even sheep won't have sex withyou. You are unreservedly pathetic, starved for attention, and lost ina land that reality forgot. You are not ANSI compliant and your markupdoesn't validate. You have a couple of address lines shorted together.You should be promoted to Engineering Manager.Do you really expect your delusional and incoherent ramblings to beread? Everyone plonked you long ago. Do you fantasize that yourtantrums and conniption fits could possibly be worth the $0.000000001worth of electricity used to send them? Your life is one bigW.O.M.B.A.T. and your future doesn't look promising either. We need totrace your bloodline and terminate all siblings and cousins in orderto cleanse humanity of your polluted genes. The good news is that nonormal human would ever mate with you, so we won't have to go into thesewers in search of your git.You are a waste of flesh. You have no rhythm. You are ridiculous andobnoxious. You are the moral equivalent of a leech. You are a livingemptiness, a meaningless void. You are sour and senile. You are aloathsome disease, a drooling inbred cross-eyed toesucker. You makeQuakers shout and strike Pentecostals silent. You have a version 1.0mind in a version 6.12 world. Your mother had to tie a pork choparound your neck just to get your dog to play with you. You thinkthat HTTP://WWW.GUYMACON.COM/FUN/INSULT/INDEX.HTM is the name of arock band. You believe that P.D.Q. Bach is the greatest composer whoever lived. You prefer L. Ron Hubbard to Larry Niven and JerryPournelle. Hee-Haw is too deep for you. You would watch test patternsall day if the other inmates would let you.On a good day you're a half-wit. You remind me of drool. You aredeficient in all that lends character. You have the personality ofwallpaper. You are dank and filthy. You are asinine and benighted.Spammers look down on you. Phone sex operators hang up on you.Telemarketers refuse to be seen in public with you. You are the sourceof all unpleasantness. You spread misery and sorrow wherever you go.May you choke on your own foolish opinions. You are a Pusillanimousgalactophage and you wear your sister's training bra. Don't botheropening the door when you leave - you should be able to slime yourway out underneath. I hope that when you get home your mother runsout from under the porch and bites you.You smarmy lagerlout git. You bloody woofter sod. Bugger off, pillock.You grotty wanking oik artless base-court apple-john. You cloutedboggish foot-licking half-twit. You dankish clack-dish plonker. Yougormless crook-pated tosser. You bloody churlish boil-brained clotpoleponce. You craven dewberry pisshead cockup pratting naff. You cockeredbum-bailey poofter. You gob-kissing gleeking flap-mouthed coxcomb. Youdread-bolted fobbing beef-witted clapper-clawed flirt-gill. May yourspouse be blessed with many bastards.You are so clueless that if you dressed in a clue skin, doused yourselfin clue musk, and did the clue dance in the middle of a field of hornyclues at the height of clue mating season, you still would not have aclue. If you were a movie you would be a double feature;_Battlefield_Earth_ and _Moron_Movies_II_. You would be out of focus.You are a fiend and a sniveling coward, and you have bad breath. Youare the unholy spawn of a bandy-legged hobo and a syphilitic camel.You wear strangely mismatched clothing with oddly placed stains. Youare degenerate, noxious and depraved. I feel debased just knowing thatyou exist. I despise everything about you, and I wish you would goaway. You are jetsam who dreams of becoming flotsam. You won't makeit. I beg for sweet death to come and remove me from a world whichbecame unbearable when you crawled out of a harpy's lair.It is hard to believe how incredibly stupid you are. Stupid as a stonethat the other stones make fun of. So stupid that you have traveledfar beyond stupid as we know it and into a new dimension of stupid.Meta-stupid. Stupid cubed. Trans-stupid stupid. Stupid collapsed toa singularity where even the stupons have collapsed into stuponium.Stupid so dense that no intelligence can escape. Singularity stupid.Blazing hot summer day on Mercury stupid. You emit more stupid in oneminute than our entire galaxy emits in a year. Quasar stupid. It cannotbe possible that anything in our universe can really be this stupid.This is a primordial fragment from the original big stupid bang. A pureextract of stupid with absolute stupid purity. Stupid beyond the lawsof nature. I must apologize. I can't go on. This is my epiphany ofstupid. After this experience, you may not hear from me for a while.I don't think that I can summon the strength left to mock your moronicopinions and malformed comments about boring trivia or your otherdrivel. Duh.The only thing worse than your logic is your manners. I have snippedaway most of your of what you wrote, because, well ... it didn'treally say anything. Your attempt at constructing a creative flame waspitiful. I mean, really, stringing together a bunch of insults among aload of babbling was hardly effective... Maybe later in life, afteryou have learned to read, write, spell, and count, you will have moresuccess. True, these are rudimentary skills that many of us "normal"people take for granted that everyone has an easy time of mastering.But we sometimes forget that there are "challenged" persons in thisworld who find these things to be difficult. If I had known that thiswas true in your case then I would have never have exposed myself towhat you wrote. It just wouldn't have been "right." Sort of likeparking in a handicap space. I wish you the best of luck in theemotional, and social struggles that seem to be placing such ademand on you.P.S.: You are hypocritical, greedy, violent, malevolent, vengeful,cowardly, deadly, mendacious, meretricious, loathsome, despicable,belligerent, opportunistic, barratrous, contemptible, criminal,fascistic, bigoted, racist, sexist, avaricious, tasteless, idiotic,brain-damaged, imbecilic, insane, arrogant, deceitful, demented, lame,self-righteous, byzantine, conspiratorial, fraudulent,libelous, bilious, splenetic, spastic, ignorant, clueless, EDLINoid,illegitimate, harmful, destructive, dumb, evasive, double-talking,devious, revisionist, narrow, manipulative, paternalistic,fundamentalist, dogmatic, idolatrous, unethical, cultic, diseased,suppressive, controlling, restrictive, malignant, deceptive, dim,crazy, weird, dyspeptic, stifling, uncaring, plantigrade, grim,unsympathetic, jargon-spouting, censorious, secretive, aggressive,mind-numbing, arassive, poisonous, flagrant, self-destructive,abusive, socially-retarded, puerile, and Generally Not Good. [/spoiler] I ran out of space.

A Horse who is also my wife

[quote]Nor are you creative, you're a 12 year old with no ideas of your own so you copy someone's story and try to pass it off as funny. You're lame, be original.[/quote]

>be me >call OP fgt

I cannot believe how incredibly stupid you are. I mean rock-hard stupid. Dehydrated-rock-hard stupid. Stupid so stupid that it goes way beyond the stupid we know into a whole different dimension of stupid. You are trans-stupid stupid. Meta-stupid. Stupid collapsed on itself so far that even the neutrons have collapsed. Stupid gotten so dense that no intellect can escape. Singularity stupid. Blazing hot mid-day sun on Mercury stupid. You emit more stupid in one second than our entire galaxy emits in a year. Quasar stupid. Your writing has to be a troll. Nothing in our universe can really be this stupid. Perhaps this is some primordial fragment from the original big bang of stupid. Some pure essence of a stupid so uncontaminated by anything else as to be beyond the laws of physics that we know. I'm sorry. I can't go on. This is an epiphany of stupid for me. After this, you may not hear from me again for a while. I don't have enough strength left to deride your ignorant questions and half baked comments about unimportant trivia, or any of the rest of this drivel.

OH my gentle beast of a man! How you sway my heart both left and right with your tender words. I feel as though you have broken down the walls of my solitude and jumped into my being; like souls connected at the seams. We are like a giant sweater, the two of us, a woolen sweater with beautifully colored patterns, argyle of course. Will you be my Julius Caesar? My Donald Trump? My knight in shining armor? By the beard of Zeus these feelings are erupting inside me like a volcano of splendid powdered sugar! It puffs up to the sky like a cloud and forms the shape of love. No one has ever made me feel this way. Thank you. My prince. _____________ I would strangle a moose with a 3 foot long piece of dental floss, gut it with my teeth and use the hide as a coat, then climb Mt. Everest barefoot while listening to Justin Bieber and cannibalizing on my climbing partner to survive with 10,000 volt shock-clamps attached to my nipples just to have a 1% chance to be able to eat a crusty piece of dried vaginal secretion from a pair of your 6-year-old panties that had never been washed. _____________ First off her tits are WAY too big. Its going to cause her back problems in the future where she will have to get breast reduction.. imagine carrying a 5 pound weight at your chest level everyday for years...try it the next time you are at the gym. Second, titty fing her would be so wack. Your shit would just get lost in those melons. If I was to hook up with a chick and she sat on her back with those giant watermelons just flopping everywhere it would be a turn off for me at least. I mean with tits that big, are the nipples going to be dimes, quarters, or silver dollars. Something tells me its photoshopped, but I mean people are really insane in this world. Girls need some uniformity, B's are great man, C's are perfect, D's can work, but seriously anything bigger than that and its time for a mental evaluation. Hooters has good wings though. _____________ ook i dont know you, wish i knew you,gotta met you but honestly your an angel ive never in my life seen a girl with your perfections in my whole life... one day i hope to met you... i cant put into words how stunning you are.. from the looks of it you have no imprections just pure natural cause to be beautiful and make people smile you have looks that will get you far in life and thats alot for me to say one day i hope to have to pleasure to met you your name should be "angel" not Satara cause that word right there describes you all over... thanks again and let me know if you ever want to met you have no flaws in you at all you would make m world the happiest place on earth to met you thank you angel. lets get to know eachother

What if everything you ever wanted... WAS TO KICK EVERYTHING IN THE FACE!? FOREVER! THEN YOU NEED PEREGRINE GREAVES!!! PUT THESE SWEET LEGS ON YOUR TITAN AND YOU WILL DECIMATE THINGS WITH YOUR POWERFUL KNEES. THEY ARE GEMS. YOU WILL LOOK GLAMOROUS LIKE A STYLISH LADY WHILE YOU KNEE SOMEONE IN THE THROAT SO HARD THEIR TEETH GO THROUGH THEIR SKULL! YOUR LEGS ARE BEDAZZLED! BEDAZZLED WITH THE STRENGTH OF 1,000 KODIAK BEARS IF KODIAK BEARS CARED ABOUT GRAVITY AND EVOLVED TO DO SWEET JUMPKICKS! YOU WILL SET YOUR CHILD ON YOUR KNEE TO GIVE HIM SOUND FATHERLY ADVICE ANDTHAT CHILD WILL EXPLODE BECAUSE YOUR KNEES ARE INSTANT DEATH! YOUR SON WILL DIE! YOUR WIFE WILL DIVORCE YOU! YOU WILL DIE ALONE ATOP THE MOUNTAIN OF CORPSES YOU'VE LEFT IN YOUR WAKE AS YOUR LIFE DISSOLVES INTO A NIGHTMARISH HELLSCAPE OF VIOLENCE AND DEPRAVITY! YOU WILL TAKE PEREGRINE GREAVES INTO THE CRUCIBLE AND YOU WILL MASSACRE PEOPLE! YOU WILL KILL THEM ALL! YOU WILL KNEE BLADEDANCERS! DENIED! GET THAT BUTTERKNIFE THE HECK OUT OF HERE! YOU WILL KNEE RADIANT WARLOCKS AND CAUSE THEM TO WEEP RADIANT TEARS! YOU WILL KNEE GOLDEN GUNSLINGERS...CAREFULLY.... YOU WILL KNEE OTHER TITANS IN THEIR BUBBLES, DIVING INTO THEIR NEON DISCO DANCE PARTIES BLIND AND MURDER THEM WITH YOUR ENERGY LEGS! IT IS YOUR BUBBLE NOW SO THAT GU---wait, THE BUBBLE IS GONE BECAUSE OF YOU!? WHY THE HECK DID YOU DO THAT!? YOU WILL RUIN YOUR K/D LIKE I HAVE BECAUSE YOU ARE ADDICTED TO THE SWEET, SWEET SOUND OF INSTANT AIRBORNE DEATH! YOU WILL CATCH SO MANY SHOTGUN BLASTS TO THE FACE AND IT WILL BE WORTH IT WHEN YOU KNOCK A BLADEDANCER OUT BEFORE HE CAN CHOP UP YOUR TEAM! EVERY PAINFUL DEATH WILL BE VALIDATED AS YOUR LEG COLLIDES WITH A FIERY WARLOCK'S GOAT HAT SO HARD THAT HE'S RENDERED BRAIN-DAMAGED AND HIS FAMILY FIGHTS WITH THE STATE OF TEXAS TO TAKE HIM OFF OF LIFE-SUPPORT! HE WILL LIVE OFF OF TUBES! BECAUSE OF TEXAAAAAAS! PEREGRINE GREEAAAAAAAAAAVES!!!

Sometimes when I poop, I use the shaping attachment from my old Play Doh fun set. I place it on my anus, and make poops in different shapes. There's nothing strange about that at all. I'm an American, living in America, and if I want to have poops shaped like stars, I have every right to. The founding fathers would have wanted it that way. _____________ Here's what you do. Wait until he's passed out, then hide a nickel in his anus. Later, ask him to let you borrow a nickel. When he says that he doesn't have a nickel, pull the nickel out of his anus. He'll think that you're a wizard. Whenever he doesn't want to f*ck, you can threaten to turn him into a frog. _____________ I have a morning ritual that I need to share. I call it "the terminator". First I crouch down in the shower in the classic "naked terminator traveling through time" pose. With my eyes closed I crouch there for a minute, visualizing either Arnold or the guy from the second movie (not the chick in the third one because that one sucked) and I start to hum the terminator theme. Then I slowly rise to a standing position and open my eyes. It helps me to proceed through my day as an emotionless, cyborg badass. The only problem is if the shower curtain sticks to my terminator leg. It ruins the fantasy. I found tonight that it is more successful to progressively humm it louder as you perform the ritual. _____________ Look. No amount of 6" bulletproof plexiglass, no fly zones, 24/over 9,000 Secret Service details, concentric rings of bodyguards, etc are going to protect this black person from a team of determined assassins pissed off by the very fact that he's a no good dirty stinkin' cocky bastard Muslim black person who's a fraud. All it takes is one bullet in his brain stem, or preferably, leaving him alive enough to suffer and feel incredible amounts of pain. No amount of security can take that high level of sustained stress and alertness. All the assassins need is one slip. Just. One. Slip. And they are hidden, while the black person's wide open. Protip: it need not have to happen on American soil. Or air for that matter. The Secret Service is taking the clear and present threat very seriously. But so what. This black person's goin' DOWN!!! _____________ In west pedophilia born and raised On the playground was where I spent most of my days Chilling out, fapping, and posting CP And all flaming some camwhores for they -blam!-ry When a couple of mods who were up to no good Started partyvanning in my neighborhood I got one little ban and my mom derailed And said "I'm gonna call Chris Hansen and send your ass to jail. _____________ I don't give a **** who you are or where you live. You can count on me to be there to bring your ****ing life to a hellish end. I'll put you in so much ****ing pain that it'll make Jesus being nailed to a cross in the desert look like a ****ing back massage on a tropical island. I don't give a **** how many reps you have or how tough you are IRL, how well you can fight, or how many ****ing guns you own to protect yourself. I'll ****ing show up at your house when you aren't home. I'll turn all the lights on in your house, leave all the water running, open your fridge door and not close it, and turn your gas stove burners on and let them waste gas. You're going to start stressing the **** out, your blood pressure will triple, and you'll have a ****ing heart attack. You'll go to the hospital for a heart operation, and the last thing you'll see when you're being put under in the operating room is me hovering above you, dressed like a doctor. When you wake up after being operated on, wondering what ticking time bomb is in your chest waiting to go off. You'll recover fully from your heart surgery. And when you walk out the front door of the hospital to go home I'll run you over with my ****ing car out of no where and kill you. I just want you to know how easily I could ****ing destroy your pathetic excuse of a life, but how I'd rather go to a great ****ing length to make sure your last remaining days are spent in a living, breathing ****ing hell. It's too late to save yourself, but don't bother committing suicide either... I'll ****ing resuscitate you and kill you again myself you bitch-faced phaggot. Welcome to hell, population: you

Are you aware that there are people in this world that have a severe medical condition which causes them to be that way? My mother for instance is one of those people. She is a truck driver that has bad knees and a bad back from driving the truck but you probably do not care about that case either. Oh well I am not one of those people I am 6'4" 245lbs and I exercise every day. I would love to see you say something like that to my mother in front of me. Probably never happen though you are probably just an internet tough guy. I doubt very seriously you would say that to someones face. Just my thought. What do you think. Oh I am sorry you probably do not have a brain. I on the other hand will be happy to buy you a plane ticket to come here and see if you have the nerve to say that to someone I know. _____________ The problem is your focusing on the things in life that don't really matter. When I was a kid I had hopes and dreams. We all did. But over time, the daily grind gets in the way and you miss the things that really matter, even though they are right in front of you, staring you in the face. I think the next time you should ask yourself "Am I on the right track here?". I don't mean to be rude but people like you I really pity. So maybe you could use the few brain cells you have and take advantage of the knowledge I have given you now. Good luck. _____________ Most students / parents don't understand the legalities of the internet. Students use lame excuses like they're "bored", or some such nonsense as a justification for their inability to follow school district policies. Every school has a computer use agreement, internet use agreement, and policies for enforcement and a list of punishments if violated. Since students feel free to violate these because of "boredom" or, "our school admin sux" isn't really the point is it? Schools have a litany of laws they must follow to get funding for the internet in the first place. Take a look at CIPA, COPA, etc. Not only the protection acts, but the FCC which provides E-Rate funding for discounts on phone and internet service require internet filtration, and these regulations have explicit rules on what is to be blocked and on which computers. _____________ God killed the dinosaurs becuase he realized how bad he f*cked up when he gave them arms that weren't in reach of their cocks...so he threw a few meteors to clear up the sheet and start fresh again, this time, creating his newest species, the human. After realizing his mistake, he quickly fixed it and and made our arms in length to reach our cocks and pleasure ourselves when we weren't praying to him. God truly is unbelievable...oh, and read the bible you b*tches, it says everything you need to know in that book! _____________ I cant even begin to understand how children like you choose to be so disrespectful to your elders. When I was growing up, if one of my many brothers or sisters said something cross to my father, they would get a licken right across the face with a corn stock. During the great depression, all was well for our family, we had everything we needed. Of course, it was no paddy walk, we had our daily chores. Up at 4 in the morning, in the bed at 11. When you unload bales of hay and disperse them amongst the cattle, the yarn that is left over can become quite hazardous to the animals if eatin, so we would have to go and pick them up, now this might now seem like nothin, but if you have ever unloaded hay you know that you do a lot of em, so for every bail of hay that we unloaded, we had to pick up the yarn. We usually saved the yarn pickin up for after we unload all the hay, it just made more sense that way. Time consumtion was of no shortage, but we didnt mind we had all day. Plus just being able to help dad with the farm was reward enough for me, but maggie and sue had other plans, you would often find them wonderin around playin games, id have to go over there and whip them with a pipe to make em work again. Milkin cows was something i enjoyed, not because it was fun, but because it was something i was good at. I wasnt good at a lot of things, but i was good at milkin cows so i decided that was one of my favorite activities. When i was young i had often dreamed of becoming a professional milker, but they got machines for that now so now i just sit. and chew. _____________ Let me tell you something you already know. The misc ain't all sunshine and rainbows. It is a very mean and nasty place and it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as misc. But it ain't how hard you hit; it's about how hard you can get hit, and keep moving forward. How much you can take, and keep moving forward. That's how miscing is done. Now, if you know what you're worth, then go out and get what you're worth. But you gotta be willing to take the hit, and not pointing fingers saying you ain't where you are because of him, or her, or anybody. Cowards do that and that ain't you. You're better than that. _____________ I have relatives from not so far back that were nimibian tribesman. They happen to have fought lions just to become warriors. I dont know what you know about lions but they aren't like your average cat. I bet you would absolutely **** yourself if you ever saw a real life lion.. especially if you were only holding a sharpened stick and you were naked. come talk to me when some of your family members have gone on the zambutu bibjano; aka the trial of life. until you have done half the **** that they have maybe you shouldnt even talk to me like this. I know you think you're hard and **** but guess what pal.. u arent'. now go grow some namibian genes and we'll talk about this **** for real _____________

Now, this is a story all about how My life got flipped-turned upside down And I'd like to take a minute Just sit right there I'll tell you how I became the prince of a town called Bel Air In west Philadelphia born and raised On the playground was where I spent most of my days Chillin' out maxin' relaxin' all cool And all shootin some b-ball outside of the school When a couple of guys who were up to no good Started making trouble in my neighborhood I got in one little fight and my mom got scared She said 'You're movin' with your auntie and uncle in Bel Air' I begged and pleaded with her day after day But she packed my suit case and sent me on my way She gave me a kiss and then she gave me my ticket. I put my Walkman on and said, 'I might as well kick it'. First class, yo this is bad Drinking orange juice out of a champagne glass. Is this what the people of Bel-Air living like? Hmmmmm this might be alright. But wait I hear they're prissy, bourgeois, all that Is this the type of place that they just send this cool cat? I don't think so I'll see when I get there I hope they're prepared for the prince of Bel-Air Well, the plane landed and when I came out There was a dude who looked like a cop standing there with my name out I ain't trying to get arrested yet I just got here I sprang with the quickness like lightning, disappeared I whistled for a cab and when it came near The license plate said fresh and it had dice in the mirror If anything I could say that this cab was rare But I thought 'Nah, forget it' - 'Yo, home to Bel Air' I pulled up to the house about 7 or 8 And I yelled to the cabbie 'Yo home smell ya later' I looked at my kingdom I was finally there To sit on my throne as the Prince of Bel Air

I cant even begin to understand how children like you choose to be so disrespectful to your elders. When I was growing up, if one of my many brothers or sisters said something cross to my father, they would get a licken right across the face with a corn stock. During the great depression, all was well for our family, we had everything we needed. Of course, it was no paddy walk, we had our daily chores. Up at 4 in the morning, in the bed at 11. When you unload bales of hay and disperse them amongst the cattle, the yarn that is left over can become quite hazardous to the animals if eatin, so we would have to go and pick them up, now this might now seem like nothin, but if you have ever unloaded hay you know that you do a lot of em, so for every bail of hay that we unloaded, we had to pick up the yarn. We usually saved the yarn pickin up for after we unload all the hay, it just made more sense that way. Time consumtion was of no shortage, but we didnt mind we had all day. Plus just being able to help dad with the farm was reward enough for me, but maggie and sue had other plans, you would often find them wonderin around playin games, id have to go over there and whip them with a pipe to make em work again. Milkin cows was something i enjoyed, not because it was fun, but because it was something i was good at. I wasnt good at a lot of things, but i was good at milkin cows so i decided that was one of my favorite activities. When i was young i had often dreamed of becoming a professional milker, but they got machines for that now so now i just sit. and chew.

Honestly, that's what I call a cool story bro. Such a riveting tale, I honestly copy and pasted it to word, saved on my hard drive, backed it up on a jump drive, drove to the bank, put the jump drive in the safe deposit box, and will leave it there until my kids turn about 12 (when they can actually state their age, and ask what it is I'm showing them), when I will pick it up, put it in an old USB drive reader and relay this cool story to them and tell them, "kids, this is what a cool story should look and sound like...not like the stories your generation tells.

ITT: How to acquire copypasta

Did you know that what you are talking about is limited by your false sense of reality? Maybe if you studied just a little bit harder while in school you wouldnt be blinded by these fallacies that have cast a cloud over your judgment. I once knew a guy like you who had everything he could ever want but in the end it meant nothing, because he never knew his true place in the grand scheme of things. Im not trying to tell you how to live your life but, honestly buddy I think its time you stepped down off of your high horse and looked life square in the eyes.

Do you want me to cry? Because I'll cry. Just for you. Not because you're making an awful attempt at insulting me, but because it will make you happy. You can use the tears for whatever you please. You want to use the salt from them to cure meat? Go on ahead. You want to keep them in a jar and have them nestled in between your sweet, sweet buns for good luck? They're yours. They say the tears of your enemies taste delicious, and I will go the extra mile to make them taste even better by preparing them in a nice hoisin sauce. You can take that tasty treat and put it on whatever you like. From tater tots to gum drops, my tears are your key to a better life.

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Not everyone is good at making pasta, m8.