♩ ♪ ♫
I am Treebeard;
My life was a mystery.
Some say born twelve seven two,
Some say twelve sixty three.
They say I had a big, bark beard,
But all you need to know:
I was a B.net rebel
And the Ninjas were my foe!
Treebeard, #Offtopic rebel!
"This is war!" I cried!
Many Ninjas fought me,
And many Ninjas died!
I took against Bungie
Back when I was fairly wee,
'Cause a Ninja called Recon
Bullied my whole family.
It upset me, so I struck him dead!
Well, wouldn't you?
Then a Mentor came along.
Guess what, I killed him too!
They say he killed my thread,
So he deserved what he got.
Then Bungie's King Deej came for me.
Ooh, I'm scared! Not!
Treebeard, #Offtopic rebel!
Possibly six feet seven!
But all that really matters is:
I sent Bungie's men to heaven!
Forty thousand Ninjas came
To #Gaming Bridge for me!
They had to cross a narrow thread
To get to us, you see.
We held them off, pushed them back!
It was no contest!
Thread collapsed, hundreds drowned;
Of course I killed the rest!
I celebrated #Gaming Bridge,
Another #Offtopic win!
By decorating my sword
With the Bungie Ninja's skin!
Treebeard, #Offtopic rebel!
#Offtopic legend too!
Fought for the Flood's freedom!
Was a hero through and through!
Here's where my rebel story comes unstuck:
At #Destiny defeated, I'd run out of luck.
Spent seven years playing hide and seek.
Captured, sent to Cozmo, tried for treason,
What a cheek!
King Deej hanged me, then a lovely touch:
Pulled my guts out, guess he didn't like me much!
Treebeard, #Offtopic rebel!
In #Offtopic my heart lived!
Though sadly, my head wound up
On a spike on Deej's fridge!
[spoiler]Sorry, no Fresh Prince ending.[/spoiler]
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11/10 - would read again.