I'm Jcaf8, am this is my first try at fanfiction. Over time, this will be tweaked, and redone. This is a first try so all suggestions will be regarded.
(note that any of variks dialougue may skip some vocabulary purposely)
"Ever since wolves rebellion stopped and skolas was killed, we haven't had any problems with the fallen this major," Variks snarled."Though it appears the Eliksni are planning something big. Is it a successor of Taniks?"
"No, although it appears the Kings are behind it. They have a new kell, and he doesn't want to hide their strength anymore." Uldren replied. He looked at his sister, awaiting her reaction.
"This may be our chance to get a grasp on the Kings. They were one of the only houses to not lose strength in the fallen's struggle against those guardians all those years ago at twilight gap. We may-"
Mara stopped and her gaze looked beyond variks. He wrapped his head around to find a crow rushing toward them.
"My queen, the techeuns have detected more. The Devils have made a pact with the Kings. They no longer wear red. A new prime is in the Devils lair, and there are yellow banners." The crow took a breath, with panic in his eyes.
"This kell wasn't a king. Without the prime the Devils were crippled. And now I understand why we never knew the Kings kell," the Queen muttered.
"Get me Petra. We need to assemble a crew, fallen bleed yellow and red, together."
End of part one. The main character in the next scenes is variks. Thank you for reading
https://www.bungie.net/en/Forum/Post/150120133/0/0
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Nice. Best thing I can say is to seperate the paragraphs more. Cannot have more than 1 person speaking per paragraph. Ps, add #Gallery #Story, those will help :)