[u]Episode 6: Crucibullies[/u]
The Vanguard was pleased with us and our defeat of the Archon Priest. Our guardians were given commendations as a reward to be used for purchasing any weapon we wished from the Vanguard. Afterwards, they made their way to Lord Shaxx to inquire about entering the Crucible.
[b]Lord Shaxx:[/b] You want the Crucible? I [i]am[/i] the Crucible.
[b]Teddy:[/b] Sooo, is that a yes or....?
[b]Winston:[/b] Sounded like a yes to me.
[b]Harley:[/b] God would you two shut the hell up and let the man talk?
[b]Commander Zavala:[/b] Shaxx, I see you've met our new heroes. They've recently taken care of our little prison break problem on Venus. What do you make of them?
[b]Shaxx:[/b] The darkness may as well come in and take the place if that's all we've got.
[b]Winston:[/b] Hey, let's not say things we can't take back now.
[b]Teddy:[/b] For real.
[b]Shaxx:[/b] The Crucible is no place for mercy, guardians. You'll be pitted against one another today. I expect to be impressed by at least one of you.
[b]Harley:[/b] *smirk* Oh, don't worry about that.
[b]Teddy:[/b] Ha! Like you've got a chance.
[b]Harley:[/b] Bring it, tons o' fun.
[b]Teddy:[/b] Ya know I'm gettin pretty sick of your cracks about my weight.
[b]Shaxx:[/b] That Hunter's got a big mouth. I bet she can back it up though. On your way guardians, it's time to see what you're made of.
Shaxx ordered us to the Rumble arena. The Anomaly would be our battleground. He informed us that our guardians would be able to communicate with one another through us, the ghosts, stating that playing each others emotions was just as critical to victory as fighting strategy. We geared up, boarded our ships, and set off to the arena.
There was no countdown for the start of the match. As soon as our guardians touched down, the game was on.
Teddy spawned in on the cave side of the arena and quickly pulled out his Red Death. As quietly as he could, he made his way to the center area.
[b]Teddy:[/b] Where the hell are they?
*POW*guardian down*
[b]Harley:[/b] Suprise fatboy!
[b]Teddy:[/b] Really?! 10 seconds into the match and you're already invis camping with a shotgun?!
[b]Harley:[/b] It's a perfectly legitimate strategy! Cry about it some more why don't you?
At that moment, Winston came up behind Harley with his auto rifle and began to spray bullets into her back. Despite having the drop on her, Harley had plenty of time to turn around, switch to her Thorn, and pelt Winston with multiple rounds.
*guardian down*
[b]Winston:[/b] What the-? Oh that's bullshit!
[b]Harley:[/b] Ha! An auto rifle? Really, bro?
Harley darted around Merv as he began the revival process and headed to the outer ring of the area. She ducked behind cover and re-activated her invisibility before heading back out in search of her next kill.
Meanwhile, Winston and Teddy had re spawned at the opposite side of the map. They found each other rather quickly.
*pop pop pop*pop pop pop*
[b]Teddy:[/b] Come on out, buddy! Don't be scared!
*pop pop pop*
[b]Winston:[/b] Like I'd be scared of some brainless Titan! You can't hit shit, bro! Seriously my grandmother has better aim than your bitch ass!
While Winston was busy taunting him, Teddy had begun sprinting toward the area Winston was shooting from. The air in front of him swirled with energy, and as he reached Winston's cover he jumped over it, spun a full 180 degrees, and unleashed his stored energy in the form of a devastating charge. His knee connected directly with Winston's face, sending him flying.
*guardian down*
[b]Winston:[/b] DAMMIT!
Teddy performed a short dance and sped away in search of Harley. He found her almost immediately, or rather, she found him.
*POW*guardian down*
[b]Teddy:[/b] Oh my god, you're [i]still[/i] camping with that thing!?
Harley simply laughed and crouched over Teddy's lifeless corpse while I began his revive.
[b]Teddy:[/b] Oh you did [i]not[/i] just t-bag me, bitch!
[b]Harley:[/b] T-bag? No... Get clam slammed mother -blam!-er!
[b]Shaxx:[/b] Heavy ammo inbound.
Winston appeared out of nowhere, blasting Harley with a burst from his fusion rifle.
[b]Winston:[/b] Haha! Maybe pay attention instead of rubbin your lady junk on every dude that comes your way!
[b]Harley:[/b] Ex-CUSE me?!
[b]Winston:[/b] I don't think there is an excuse for you!
[b]Harley:[/b] Rrrrr!
Winston retreated back the way he'd come in, rounding the corner just as Teddy was spawning. He charged his fusion rifle, and fired.
*guardian down*
[b]Teddy:[/b] Nice spawn-kill asshole!
[b]Winston:[/b] Like I was just gonna let you run off!
[b]Teddy:[/b] You could have given me a second!
Lord Shaxx's voice rang out again over our comms.
[b]Shaxx:[/b] Again, the Crucible is no place for mercy. Fight back!
[b]Teddy:[/b] Nice motivational speech! Your help is greatly appreciated! Dick.
[b]Shaxx:[/b] I'm sorry, what was that?
[b]Teddy:[/b] ...Nothing.
[b]Shaxx:[/b] Mhmm. Heavy ammo available.
As soon as Teddy re-spawned he headed straight for the heavy ammo box that had appeared during his revive. He swapped to his special weapon and proceeded on to the special box. The next couple of minutes were saturated with the sound of explosions. Winston and Harley fired rocket after rocket at each other until finally trading kills as Teddy stared from afar, having stopped to watch the two battle it out.
[b]Teddy:[/b] Man I wish I would've brought some popcorn. That was great.
Pop*pop*pop*pop*
[b]Teddy:[/b] Ow, shit!
[b]Winston:[/b] Hey there pretty lady! Care for a dance.
*pop*pop*pop*
Winston came up the hallway behind Teddy and continued firing. Teddy quickly ducked around a corner for a brief period to regain his health and shield. As soon as he had recovered he stepped out into the open.
[b]Teddy:[/b]*grin* Try this on for size Floofy!
*KAPOW*guardian down*
[b]Teddy:[/b] Mmmm, that felt gooood didn't it?
[b]Winston:[/b] Merv, what the hell was that?!
[b]Merv:[/b] Checking..... Sniper rifle. Solar. Enhanced impact and range. Fast Handling. Name: Felwinter's Lie.
[b]Winston:[/b] Wha-? That's not a sniper rifle!
[b]Shaxx:[/b] Five minutes remaining.
Harley again found Teddy, but this time he was out of shotgun range. She pulled out her Thorn and started firing. Teddy, after being hit twice in the head, turned to her and unloaded 2 bursts of his pulse rifle, landing each burst square in her face.
*guardian down*
[b]Harley:[/b] Wait for it... waaaait for it... What? You should be dead!
Teddy just stood there and danced, a huge grin on his face.
[b]Teddy:[/b] Ha! Red Death dance party, babay!
[b]Harley:[/b] Oh that's garbage!
The next few minutes were hectic. Harley received a double kill after activating her super and bladedancing right through her friends as though they weren't even there, crouching over their bodies with each kill. Winston responded by destroying Harley twice in a row with his fusion rifle.
[b]Harley:[/b] Dude, put that thing down you special ammo abusing pussy!
[b]Teddy:[/b] Says the low self-esteem shotgun camper!
[b]Harley:[/b] Low self-? How the hell did you come up with that?
[b]Teddy:[/b] Harley, babe your whole "clam slamming" thing is clearly an attempt to get us to like you more. It's not working by the way. We're just sticky [i]and[/i] pissed off now.
[b]Harley:[/b] Wha- HOW DARE YOU!
[b]Teddy:[/b] Call em like I see em babydoll! Plus, you know... evidence.
*guardian down*
That "babydoll" remark got Teddy killed almost immediately. Harley hit him with a grenade and sprinted to him, burying a knife in his neck. Harley requested Merv switch her to Gunsliner, to which he quickly obliged. Winston ran up and blasted Harley to death as she was busy swapping her subclass. They were evenly matched. As the game went on the score remained much too close to call.
[b]Shaxx:[/b] One minute left.
The match got hectic in the last minute. Our guardians abandoned all thought of cover and instead ran headfirst into every firefight they could. At the 30 second mark Harley and Winston were tied at 23 kills apiece, with Teddy trailing by 1. When next the two met, Harley killed Winston with a few quick shots from her Thorn. Winston activated his Radiance just in time to toss a fusion grenade into Harley's back as she ran to find Teddy.
*Boom*guardian down*
[b]Harley:[/b] Dammit, you self res crutch usin dickhole!
[b]Winston:[/b] Haha didn't see that one comin didya, bitch?! Don't think I don't see you over there Teddy! Come here buddy!
[b]Teddy:[/b] *smirk*
[b]Winston:[/b] Haha, Merv look at this idiot. Chargin in like a du-
*SMASH*guardian down*
[b]Shaxx:[/b] You've got 30 seconds!
[b]Winston:[/b] Bullshit! Oh you're such garbage dude!
[b]Teddy:[/b] I'd say killing 50% of the enemy players with one super qualifies as the opposite.
[b]Winston:[/b] Wha- there's only 2 of us!
[b]Teddy:[/b] Stats don't lie, bro. That was efficient as shit.
Harley jumped in at the exact wrong moment. With Teddy's aftermath still going strong, she was down in 2 pulses.
[b]Teddy:[/b] Oh and that's 100% efficiency right there! Who's garbage now?!
He saw Winston spawn in a good 20 yards away and hurriedly attempted to close the gap, intending to shoulder charge for the win.
*POWWW*BOOM*
Just before Teddy's shoulder connected with its mark, Winston was hit with a Golden Gun shot from his flank and exploded, the blast killing them both in an eruption of flame. Harley pointed at where they died and laughed, reveling in her victory.
[b]Harley:[/b] You boys just got wrecked.
[b]Shaxx:[/b] More efforts like that, and we might just win this.
[b]Teddy:[/b] Oh we're gettin a rematch later.
Up next
https://www.bungie.net/en/Forum/Post/117839313/0/0
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