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Edited by IAmJoshman:
8/15/2015 11:56:45 PM
327
The Chuck Norris "Facts" Thread
Let's all perform our daily worship of Chuck Norris
Now please let us hear the "Facts" the Chuck has to offer
News: 50 Facts, Norris approves
News: 100 Facts, Norris is pleased
News: 250 Facts, Chuck killed Osama bin Laden in fit of happiness
News: 550 Facts, Chuck went in time to stop the JFK assasination. As Oswald shot, Chuck's beard caught and shot back the bullets at Oswald, killing him. JFK's head exploded from sheer amazement.
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Best Facts:
Chuck Norris took oranges off an apple tree and made the best lemonade you've ever tasted - JollyRoger343
Chuck Norris was supposed to star in the show "Man vs. Wild," but the directors didn't want kids thinking that "lava is safe to eat" - Rubyk
Chuck Norris can rub 2 pieces of fire together and make wood -WiliestHarbor66
Chuck Norris knows Victoria's Secret - MasterMG33
Chuck Norris can sit in the corner of a circular room - Omalpha
Chuck Norris got into a knife fight... The knife lost - Omalpha
When Chuck Norris dies he will be carrying his own coffin - hertylip
Chuck Norris likes his meat so rare he only eats unicorns - II Âømârk II
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[b][i][u]THE HALL OF THE NORRIS[/u][/i][/b]
[b][i]The Greatest Contributor: Singh1199[/i][/b]
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Some people clap to turn their lamps on. Chuck Norris claps to turn the sun on!
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When Chuck Norris stands in front of a mirror, the mirror shatters, because even a mirror knows not to stand between Chick Norris and Chick Norris.
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1 ReplyEdited by A_Lycanroc: 6/21/2015 8:37:07 PMChuck Norris was born on May 6th 1945 The nazís surrendered May 7th 1945 Coincidence? I think not.
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2 RepliesEvery night before the boogeyman goes to sleep, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris can rhyme with orange. Chuck Norris once took a piss in a can. Today we call it redbull.
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Chuck Norris once beat a brick wall in a game of tennis.
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1 ReplyChuck Noris went back in time. The fact that there were 2 chuck Noris at once caused the universe to explode. Chuck Noris then rebuilt the universe
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The boogeyman checks his closet for Chuck Norris every night.
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1 ReplyChuck Norris accidentally fell out of a helicopter on his vacation in Arizona. [spoiler]thats how the Grand Canyon was born[/spoiler]
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Chuck Norris was Darth Vader's father
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You guys want to hear a story? One day Chuck Norris was pulling weeds in his garden. He pulled a weed out of ground but the ground came with it. That was how Mount Everest was created. He now lives at the top and thats why most people can't survive climbing it, they aren't worthy enough for Chuck Norris
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2 RepliesChuck Norris [i]can[/i] even
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2 RepliesBruce Lee trained him .... and kicked his arse. Oh, you meant those "facts" and not actual facts, ah well.
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4 RepliesWhen Chuck Norris looks at himself in a mirror, there is no reflection. There can only be one Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris died 19 years ago, Death just doesn't have the courage to tell him
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Norris Approves of This post
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Chuck Norris doesn't take a shower, He stares at the shower head until it cries.
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He stares at books, then the book tells him what he need to know
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Chuck norris ran into a room with a grenade and killed 100 people he ran into another and pulled the pin 1000 people died he ran into another room and killed 1000001 people the extra one was the grneade
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Chuck Bump
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Chuck Norris threw a grenade and it killed 100 people, then it exploded
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Chuck Norris can run fast enough that he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
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Chuck Bump
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Chuck Norris once went Mano en Mano with Earths second moon.
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Edited by Rat: 6/23/2015 2:23:57 AMChuck Norris was born the day before the German Party surrendered
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The truth can't handle chuck Norris
