I can't help but fall for xur a little harder each week. There's something so sensual about his seaweed tendrils blowing in the breeze. At times, I close my eyes and allow myself to imagine one tenderly caressing my cheek. His face is shrouded in mystery but sometime I just stare into his eyes for hours on end. I hate when he goes away but distance makes the heart grow fonder. I can't eat because our kidneys are one. All I think of is him. When I pee I stare into the urine and lap up the smallest sip with my tongue. I am home. I know we are creatures of the same heart and long for the simple excrement of each other's rectums. Xur- come home.