I am a god damn failure. I am 22 years old and a lowly cook at a fast food joint. This is the only job I've ever had and I'll probably never get a better one. My coworker harasses me verbally all day. If I told my boss, he would probably cut my already low salary. All that douche cares about is money
Outside of work, I don't do anything. My best friend in mentally retarded, but I suppose that's better then nothing. I am in love with one of my neighbors. She's a gorgeous southern belle who just moved here, but I'm sure she hates me to.
I'm stuck in my home town because I never learned to drive. I fail the drivers test every fucking time I take it. Worst of all I live in a pineapple under the sea.
-
My job is so -blam!-ing unbelievable. I'll try to sum it up by first telling you about the folks I work with: First, there is this supermodel wanna-be chick. Yeah, okay, she is pretty hot, but damn is she completely useless. The girl is constantly fixing her hair or putting on makeup. She is extremely self-centered and has never once considered the needs or wants of anyone but herself. She is as dumb as a box of rocks, and I still find it surprising that she has enough brain power to continue to breathe. The next chick is completely the opposite. She might even be one of the smartest people on the planet. Her career opportunities are endless, and yet she is here with us. She is a zero on a scale of 1 to 10. I'm not sure she even showers, much less shaves her "womanly" parts. I think she might be a lesbian, because every time we drive by the hardware store, she moans like a cat in heat. But the jewel of the crowd has got to be the -blam!-ing stoner. And this guy is more than just your average pothead. In fact, he is baked before he comes to work, during work, and I'm sure after work. He probably hasn't been sober anytime in the last ten years, and he's only 22. He dresses like a beatnik throwback from the 1960's, and to make things worse, he brings his big -blam!-ing dog to work. Every -blam!-ing day I have to look at this huge Great Dane walk around half-stoned from the second-hand smoke. Hell, sometimes I even think it's trying to talk with its constant bellowing. Also, both of them are constantly hungry, requiring multiple stops to McDonalds and Burger King, every single -blam!-ing day. Anyway, I drive these -blam!-tards around in my van and we solve mysteries and shit.
-
I was about to tell you to stfu and stop being a bitch and do something with your life and a pineapple is a great house to live in...a pineapple??? Oh I see what you did there. Stupid post but kinda funny I give you 3 snowflakes out of 5
-
▒▒▒░░░░░░░░░░▄▐░░░░ ▒░░░░░░▄▄▄░░▄██▄░░░ ░░░░░░▐ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° ▌░░░░▀█▄░ ░░░░░░▐█▄█▌░░░░░░▀█▄ ░░░░░░░▀▄▀░░░▄▄▄▄▄▀▀ ░░░░░▄▄▄██▀▀▀▀░░░░░ ░░░░█▀▄▄▄█░▀▀░░░░░░ ░░░░▌░▄▄▄▐▌▀▀▀░░░░░ ░▄░▐░░░▄▄░█░▀▀░░░░░ ░▀█▌░░░▄░▀█▀░▀░░░░░ ░░░░░░░░▄▄▐▌▄▄░░░░░ ░░░░░░░░▀███▀█░▄░░░ ░░░░░░░▐▌▀▄▀▄▀▐▄░░░ ░░░░░░░▐▀░░░░░░▐▌░░ ░░░░░░░█░░░░░░░░█░░ ░░░░░░▐▌░░░░░░░░░█░ GIT SPOOKED M8
-
Solid gold
-
*Sees post. Then sees OP's UN.* Whatever makes you happy
-
Huh? This post remind me of spongebob...
-
Saw it coming.
-
I keked
-
You are the type of soldier I want, have you considered joining the army?
-
You gotta learn to live like Larry
-
Son of a bitch
-
You could be me
-
I crie evrytime
-
I thought sandy likes spongebob.
-
Kthkbai
-
Crie moar.
-
Get stronger. I cant drive for shit, but my will to learn shit I cant do makes me overcome things. Put time in effort in things that you want to be good at. Go to college, look for a better job, do whatever the fück you wanna do!
-
You almost had me giving you advice there.
-
The-blam!-? Spongebob loves sandy?!
-
Thats so sad! I can never look at spongebob the same way again!
-
-
You either die a Spongebob or live long enough to see yourself become a Squidward.
-
Ayyyyyyyyyyyyyy [spoiler]yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy[/spoiler]
-
I was gearing up for some sage advice. Never mind.
-
You forgot to mention the pet with a higher IQ than you.
-
#Whitepeopleproblems