Dazarobbo was having a horrible day. He just got laid off from his job and his girlfriend just kicked him out of her house when she heard the news. His relationship with her had been deteriorating ever since he became a moderaor on bungie.net. Instead of hammering her, he spent his time hammering noobs on the forums. He had nowhere to go and he had no internet. His family was about 777 miles away and he only had enough money and gas to get to 666 miles. Daza knew he had to find a place to stay. So he called his best friend, Bobcast. Daza explained the situation, about how he got fired from his job and kicked out by his girlfriend and that he just needed a place to stay. Bob listened patiently to Dazarobbo. When Daza was done talking he asked, "Do you think I could stay at your place for a couple of days? Until I find a job at least?" "Sure man, Recon Number 54, Foman, TU and I are going to be having a drinking party tonight. You could join us for a couple of days." Dazarobbo thanked him a lot for being such an awesome friend. So Dazarobbo hitched a ride on a bus (his ex girlfriend owned the semi-truck since she was a trucker). 30 minutes later, he was at Bobcasts apartment and he knocked on the door. Bob opened the door up and welcomed dazarobbo in. "The other guys are inside playing halo reach, there are chips and salsa in the kitchen and beer in the fridge, help yourself dude. You will be staying in room upstairs on the left." he said. "Thanks man, I'm sorry to drop in on you like this." said Dazarobbo. "No problem man, I am a doctor. It is my duty to take care of people, especially my friends." Dazarobbo went upstairs to put his things in his room. Then he came back down and said hi to the others. "sup?" said True Underdog, "Hey -blam!- whats happnin?" said foman " Hey son? how are you doing?" said recon number, who took up a whole couch. "Just hanging out for a couple of days. So he sat down to play some games with the other ninjas. When nightfall came, the drinking games started. Foman and Bobcast played against Dazarobbo and True underdog in a game of beer pong while Recon number ate 2 bags of chips and drank one of the kegs of beer. So the games went on and the ninjas got pretty drunk. Dazarobbo, who was staggering drunk, burst out crying all of a sudden. "yo whats wrong bro? *hiccup*" said foman. "Ever since I became a forum ninja, my life went downhill!I had so much fun banning people that I didn't pay attention to my girlfriend or my job! So I lost m-my job and I l-lost my girlfriend a-and she k-kicked me out! " Dazarobbo bellowed. The other ninjas looked at him with sympathetic glances. Bobcast put a hand on his shoulder and said, "You are not the only one. I wanted to become a surgeon. But ever since I became a ninja, my life went downhill. I wasn't able to finish my classes in collegeman, now I am only a nurse. Plus I got kicked out of my girlfriend's house too!" "R-Really?" said Dazarobbo. "So was I man" said foman, who now had tears in his eyes. "I was goin to be a -blam!- lawyer yo! but then I became a ninja! and DAMN! I had so much fun kickin them stupid white folks from bungie.net and haven them swear me out that i forgot to do my classes an shit. my bitch kicked me out of her house and i was on the street! An my homie, Bobcast took me in!" Dazarobbo was astounded. He looked at True underdog, who immediatly broke down and cried. "me too man! I have a beautiful son! But I never paid attention to him because I was a ninja on bungie.net! My girlfriend kicked me out and bobcast took me in!". Recon number 54 burped. "I never knew we were all so alike... I love you guys so much!" exclaimed Dazarobbo "we need eachother don't we?" They all nodded, even recon number nodded, sending undulations through his blubber. So they all gathered around and hugged eachother. Then, what one can only hope was the guidance of the alcohol, they began to fondle eachothers asses. The ninjas began to undress until they were butt naked. Their throbbing banhammers hanging . Dazarobbo and bobcast caught eachother's eyes and began to embrace eachother. While Dazarobbo and Bobcast were making out, True underdog knelt in front of foman. Then foman shoved his big black veiny banhammer into his ass, making True Underdog squeal. Meanwhile, Recon number 54, who couldn't get out of the couch because of his weight, began to jerk his banhammer. Bobcast looked at Dazarobbo's raging banhammer and knelt down. He put it in his mouth and sucked on it. Meanwhile foman and true underdog cried out and they both sprayed banhammer juice at the same time. Recon number was still jerking. Bobcast's sucking was making dazarobbo moan in ecstacy. All of a sudden he cried out and sprayed into Bob's mouth. They were spent. But then bobcast looked at recon meaningfully. Recon, getting the message, pulled out his glass eye. Then bobcast came over and stuck his banhammer ino recon's eye socket. This got recon to moan and jerk off even more furiously. Bobcast screamed as he came into that eyesocket, dripping banhammer juioce down recon's cheek. Recon came all over bobcast's legs. The night went on and the ninjas are now closest friends. But then one night, foman was was monitoring the forums and saw this story. "WHO THE -blam!- RECORDED THIS SHIT AND MADE AN ALTERNATE ACCOUNT ON BNET?!?!?"

[spoiler]Late Night Games Chapter 1: Lemon Spongebob and Squidward were bored. They were forced to work there, again, for 24 hours. Spongebob was mopping the green wooden floors, while Squidward was reading a purple book, with a secret magazine hidden behind the book. Squidward was horny, with his squid penis hard. He was rubbing himself, but he was not staring at the pages. He was staring at Spongebob. For about two months now, he and Spongebob have been in a relationship. They've kissed, and dry humped, but not sex. Yet. Squidward wanted to, so bad. He felt like he was pressuring Spongebob to do it, but he had no problem. Spongebob turned around, and showed his square butt. Squidward felt a throb. He was about to cum. Panting, he lifted himself up, and watched Spongebob. He said, "Hey, Spongebob?" Spongebob turned, smiling. "Yes?" "Um, I want to do something with you. Is that okay?" Squidward asked. Spongebob's face went all confused. "Like what?" "That..."sex" thing we have been talking about." "Sex? Oh, yeah." "So?" "So what?" "Did you want...to...try it?" "What? Here?" "Sure." "I don't know..." Spongebob looked at the floor. Squidward walked over to the sponge and draped an arm over his shoulders. He smiled. "Why don't we try it?" He suggested, slipping a tentacle down south, under Spongebob's pants and grabbing his limp dick. He rubbed it to life. Spongebob moaned. Squidward continued to rub and grab at Spongebob's balls and get him hot. It did make him hot, and Spongebob saw Squidward's erection for the first time for that night. He kneeled down and took the light blue cock in his mouth. Spongebob sucked and licked and rubbed while he worked at his own hard on. Spongebob was more hot, though, as he felt his dick heat up with his seed. He moaned and went faster. He then took it deeper in his mouth and deep throated. Spongebob conjured up more saliva and sucked faster. Squidward moaned and held the back of Spongebob's head. His own ejaculate rose back up into the main tube. He was gonna cum. Squidward held on for his life. It was gonna be a big one! Even bigger than when he and Spongebob dry humped and rubbed each other's dicks. Squidward scrunched up his face and gritted his teeth. His face was becoming beet red. "Ohh...h-here it...c-comes!" He moaned. Spongebob went slower, and still suckled. He moaned himself, apparently at his own limit. He went at a slow pace and then pulled the dick out. He took it with one yellow hand and rubbed, nice and slow. This made Squidward groan and made his body heat up another five or ten degrees. He rolled his eyes back as a final stroke set him off. Hot squid spunk shot up into the air, and landed on the yellow recipiant's face, on his tongue, in his holes, on his hands, and even on that nose of his. Spongebob was set off, and he ejaculated all over Squidward's legs, and on the once clean floor. He gasped for breath, while panting Squidward's name, excitidly. When it was over, Squidward scooped Spongebob up and laid him on a table, belly side on the table. He took Spongebob's pants fully off and they hung around Spongebob's ankles. Squidward panted as he got himself hard again, which took a couple of minutes because of the refractory period, and positioned himself at Spongebob's spongy asshole. "Ready?" Squidward asked. "Y-yeah." Spongebob agreed. Squidward slipped inside of Spongebob, causing a yelp, as his asshole was stretched. Spongebob whined a little, and Squidward stopped. He asked, "Am I hurting you?". Spongebob gasped for breath, and nodded, slightly. "Kind of. Take it slow, okay?" Spongebob asked. "Of course." Squidward laid tiny kisses on the sponge's back as he slipped further inside. It still hurt, but the pain was soon taken over by pleasure. Squidward began a steady rythem, inside and out, inside and out. Spongebob moaned with pleasure, and raked the table with his fingernails. He shut his eyes and arched his back. Spongebob being thrust in and out like that, moving, made his own dick hard again. Spongebob panted out, at one point, "S-Squidward, rub me, please?" Squidward reached around and rubbed Spongebob while keeping his own rythem still. Squidward was increasing his thrusts, and his pants. He was getting close again. Spongebob felt his dick throb as the pleasure became unbearable once again. Spongebob let out a moan and arched his own non-exsistant spine. He opened his eyes, and they rolled back at the lights above them. "This is so wrong...but it feels so good!" spongebob thought. Squidward bucked and thrust faster, while he felt his build up begin to rise. He wanted to cum, right inside the sponge. He smiled at the thought, and held onto Spongebob with one tentacle, and two others rubbing his dick. Spongebob's dick throbbed again and shot his load all over the table. Spongebob moaned, "Squidward!" while that set Squidward off, and he cummed inside Spongebob's asshole, filling it with seething hot squid seed. He groaned out a "Spongebob!" while he came, and then pulled out. Seed dribbled down Spongebob's leg, and made a mess in his shorts. Spongebob slipped to his knees, panting and moaning. He still held onto the table. 'Wow..." Spongebob thought. Squidward cleaned himself up, and helped Spongebob clean up. They went back to work, with Spongebob cleaning up seed and Squidward in his thoughts, thinking: "I lost my virginity...to that once annoying as hell neighbor of mine...now my life is perfect..." [/spoiler]

[spoiler]the kingdom of iron Chapter 1: the man that raised an army The iron king, hunter of undead, feared by all undead as a man of torture, this is his story The iron king was raised in the eastern lands, always admiring the fine blades and armor. His desire to rule stronger than even the most envious. During his rise to power in his early years, he met a man by the name of Alonne. "Hmm, yes" said Alonne, his voice muffled behind his mask"I could rise you to king, but only if you allow me as general." The iron king thought about this and decided, it was time for a new ruler, as no monarch lasts forever, every kingdom will fade. The iron king then built a massive kingdom of iron and as promised, made Alonne general of his army. The iron king was given a burnt black crown, which was scavenged from the treasury of the previous castle. "Alonne!" Yelled the Iron king "yes sir." Said Alonne in his newly crafted armor, katana by his side. "We will seize the land, one bit at a time" said the king"so gather your army and get ready at the gates." And then the men were gathered and prepared for war. [/spoiler] Did you like it?

I'll just post the TL;DR version. [spoiler]Four years after the events of Halo 3, Forward Unto Dawn drifts towards Requiem from the destroyed ring.[27] Cortana wakes Master Chief from cryonic sleep shortly before rogue Covenant forces board the vessel.[28][29] The remnants of Forward Unto Dawn are caught in Requiem's gravity well and pass through an opening to crash-land on its interior. As Chief and Cortana explore Requiem, fighting hostile Covenant and Prometheans, Cortana malfunctions. She reveals that she is experiencing "rampancy", a declining mental state where AIs past their operating expectancies "think" themselves to death. Chief promises to get Cortana to Earth, believing that Cortana's creator, Doctor Catherine Halsey, can fix Cortana's condition.[30] Chief and Cortana pick up garbled transmissions from a human ship, Infinity, who have picked up Dawn '​s distress call.[31] Cortana attempts to warn Infinity away from Requiem's gravity well and directs the Chief to deactivate what she believes are communications jammers.[32] Instead, the Chief releases the Didact, an ancient Forerunner warrior, from imprisonment.[33] The Didact takes control of the Prometheans and Covenant and attacks Infinity after it is dragged into Requiem.[34][35] Chief makes contact with Infinity and helps repel the Didact's attack. Chief and Cortana recommend attacking the Didact while he is vulnerable, but Infinity captain Del Rio orders them to destroy the gravity well so their ship can escape.[36] In the process, Chief is contacted by a Forerunner known as the Librarian – the wife of the Didact, as well as ancient humanity's protector.[37][38] She explains that the Forerunners were divided on how best to combat the Flood. After failing to discover a way to immunize biological beings from the parasite, the Didact used a device called the Composer to convert the warriors under his command into digital versions immune to infection. Requiring more soldiers, the Didact forcibly converted captured humans into Prometheans, before being stopped and imprisoned by the Librarian.[39] The Librarian, who has guided humanity's development, accelerates the Chief's evolution; this grants him immunity to the Composer.[40] After destroying the gravity well,[41] Del Rio orders a retreat back to Earth, doubting the Chief and Cortana's testimony.[42] The Master Chief disobeys orders to stand down and relinquish the malfunctioning Cortana, and stays behind to oppose the Didact.[43] Infinity executive officer Commander Lasky gives Chief an armed transport and wishes him luck.[44] Chief and Cortana attempt to sabotage the Didact's ship before he leaves, but when they are unsuccessful they follow the Didact to a Halo ring, Installation 03.[45][46] The Composer has been moved from the ring onto the nearby Ivanoff Research Station, which the Covenant attack.[47] The Chief defends Ivanoff, but the Didact retrieves the Composer and uses it on the station, composing every individual except the Chief.[48] Chief and Cortana use a fighter to follow the Didact's ship through slipspace towards Earth.[49] Aided by Infinity, now commanded by Lasky, and the UNSC home fleet, the Chief boards the Didact's ship with a nuclear warhead.[50] Cortana inserts copies of herself into the Didact's computer systems to overwhelm the Didact's shield, but not before the Didact directs the Composer at Earth.[51] With the help of Cortana, the Chief defeats the Didact, who falls into a slipspace corridor generated underneath the Composer.[52] The Master Chief activates the bomb but is saved by Cortana, who sacrifices herself. The Chief is found by a UNSC rescue team and is taken back to Infinity, where he, mourning the loss of Cortana, talks with Lasky about Earth, duty, and what his duty as a soldier means.[53] In a post-credits cutscene, UNSC forces descend on the city of New Phoenix, the location the Didact used the Composer on, to find its inhabitants composed. In a narration, the Didact proclaims the Forerunner's role as custodians of the galaxy having to bear the Mantle of Responsibility, and humanity as the greatest threat in the galaxy.[54] Master Chief removes his armor aboard Infinity; if the player completes the game on Legendary difficulty, the Chief's eyes are briefly shown.[55][/spoiler]

[spoiler]As deej jumped up on the bed, he could feel the desticles pulling at his clitoris. They wouldn't stop and wanted more. Giving into his lust he pulled down his pants and let the desticles have at it. They kept on pulling and sucking unti deej yelped and said "My banhammer is about to explode". Out of suprise deej let it all out and the desticles bathed in his moderator juices 'till they couldn't bathe no more. [/spoiler]

I hate fanfiction writers. Most of them can barely string letters into a word, let alone words into a sentence into a story. Terrible spelling and stupidity abound. Ugh.