[b]The misadventures of RNG6, Baboon and Caterpillar, part I: A rude awakening[/b] Up ahead in the distance, I saw a shimmering light, my body grew heavy and my senses cleared, as I was ripped from the dark. “Wake the –blam!- up! We need to hustle before the bugs find us”, a gruff, yet monotonous voice said to me. It belonged to a light-emitting floating eye “Oh, right…,"the eye spoke," it is policy that I tell you now that you’ve been dead for a long time and that you will see and hear a lot of things that won’t make one –blamming!- bit of sense. I am your Ghost by the way, but a sweet-ass honey like you can call me Daddy-G.” Confused, I tried to look around. I was wearing some kind of helmet, which made it difficult to take in the view in one go. In addition, I was lying spread-eagled in an old car wreck. I stood up. A few hundred meters in front of me there was a big, rusty wall. Behind me the car graveyard extended for quite a bit. Some grassy knolls broke up the scenery a bit. The sun was low in the west and the wind was cold, chilling me right through my steel reinforced clothes, boots and gloves. Then I noticed the bones lying in and around the cars. Some still part of a skeleton, others strewn about like a demonic dog had been playing with them. So many bones, belonging to so many people! “What is this? What am I doing? Why am I here?”, I asked in a hoarse voice. “Hurry! The! –Blam!-! Up!” the flying eye shouted at me. “I thought you were a Hunter? If you want to ponder questions of philosophy like a –blamming!- Warlock, you can do it after I have safely delivered you to the Tower. Go, there!” The visor of my helm lighted up and a hole in the big wall was highlighted by a symbol. “Uh, right!” I tried to clear my head and started walking towards the hole in the wall. “-Blam!- it, you can run you know! In fact you better start doing that right now, the bugs are coming” Then I heard what I can only describe as a slurping cry. I looked around and saw not entirely human shapes jumping from car to car, moving fast in my direction. I started to sprint towards the point indicated on my visor. I stepped through the hole in the wall. Inside it was hollow and much bigger than it seemed from the outside. We ran on, and reached some crumbling scaffolding. “You are in luck, honey. There is a rifle just lying here in the dust. It still seems to work. It is not much, but it will still squash a bug.” “So… Daddy-G, right?", I said. "Well, Daddy… I don’t think I have ever used a gun before and I don’t think I want to. Can’t we come to some arrangements with whoever is following us?” Somehow the flying orb managed to mimic the expression of a human rolling his eyes. “Just –blamming!- great, I get stuck with the only Hunter who is also a pacifist. Listen, honey, the Fallen don’t talk. They shoot. I suggest you do the same. Just point the hole away from you and squeeze that little thingy near that handle when one of the bastards comes up to you.” Reluctantly I picked up the gun and we pushed on through some badly lit passages, until we came to a larger space with air ducts in the walls. From the ducts came a noise like something big was on the move. “The –blammers!- are in the walls!” Just as Daddy-G said that, several man-sized bugs poured out of the ducts. Followed by an extremely large and scary looking warrior-bug with four arms that were holding the biggest gun I had ever seen. [i]Oh crap![/i] I thought as I peed my pants. “Shoot it!” Daddy-G yelled. I pointed the gun at the monstrous bug and squeezed the trigger. The muzzle flared, there was a loud bang. I missed my mark by a few feet as the kickback of the shot launched the gun into my stomach. In pain, I dropped the rifle. “-Blamming- -blam-! You just managed to piss it off! Run! Follow me!” As I darted into the hallway that my visor suggested was a possible escape route, I heard a shot as a bunch of what seemed like burning embers flew just above my head. A second shot followed and this time some of the embers connected, biting into my back. It hurt like hell. “Daddy-G! I am shot!” I cried out. [i]I may be dying, again![/i] “Don’t whine! You aren’t even bleeding much yet. Just run!” I ran as if the devil was on my heels, which, for all I knew, was actually the case. We shot into another hallway which exited into a bigger room. At its center stood a big ship-like object, with an orange body, sporting red thrusters and wings. “You are one lucky son of a –blam!-“, Daddy-G said, “we can use that old cruiser to get out of here. Hold up.” Daddy-G dematerialized in a cascade of crumbling light particles. Some moments after, the same happened to me, which somehow was a strangely pleasant feeling. After I had materialized again, I found myself strapped into a moldy leather seat in front of a dusty display with buttons with unknown symbols and letters on them. “Yeehaw! We are getting the hell out of here, honey! Hold on to your hat!” The sudden acceleration hit me like a ton of bricks and I passed out.