Guardians, the survival of the human race lies heavily and solely on your shoulders. The burden of not only saving our race, but our entire galaxy as well, is knowingly a very irksome task to accomplish. I understand your frustration and your tirelessness, fighting an ongoing fight on not one, not two, not even three, but four fronts. With the Hive nestled in our moon and invading our Earth, Vex overflowing Mercury and growing on Venus, the Fallen everywhere your eyes turn, and the overweight Cabal on Mars... it's enough to drive anyone insane.
Of course, you already know your duties. This may come to you as senseless dribble, but fighting amongst yourselves... it has to end. You cannot pretend these tactless endeavors of yours go unnoticed or unreported. The whole of the Vanguard has come to me seeking help with addressing this issue publicly. I'm sure you all know. But I will go into it anyways.
Slapping. Yes, that's it. Slapping. It's known that Ikora Rey, Warlock Vanguard, is very short tempered. However, you don't see her running around and slapping her subordinates or pushing them around, now, do you? As warlocks, you have such a vital role in this fight against the darkness. You are the role models of all others. Teachers! Holders of peace! Why waste your talents on slapping your team or pushing them off cliffs?!
"Defeating Crota was no easy feat. Our Fireteam of six was was comprised of three warlocks, a titan, and two hunters. The warlocks had the most vital job when we attempted to cross that damned bridge. Ugh it was stressful with that big red knight thing swinging his blade about. But we did just fine on that part. It's Crota's end that the warlocks screwed us on. Slapped me right in the back of the head. Thought it was funny. Well it wasn't! I fell down and landed in front of Crotas gatekeeper, who damn near sliced me in half. Wasn't my fault when the oversoul annihilated my team. Damn warlocks..."
[b]-Daniel Brank, Male Gunslinger Hunter[/b]
"We were on Venus. Ishtar region. Searching for Atheon in the Vault of Glass. We had just reached a vast platform housed by nothing. Just stone pillars everywhere. I stood at the edge to look down and see how far the drop was... it was endless. Then I felt a slap on the back of my head. Hot and flaming slap. That's when I noticed I was falling endlessly to the sound of my team's warlock laughing his arse off."
[b]-Lady Iya, Female Defender Titan[/b]
"You ever have that gut wrenching feeling when you daydream and feel like you're moving? Well, you don't actually move. At least... you're not supposed to. Me and a few friends were at the tower, preparing to head out for a strike or two. We had some warlock chick with us that only our Fireteam leader knows. She was just a random to us. I started daydreaming. Or rather, some divine being in control of my body went AFK. I remember where I was when I stopped moving. And I remember where I was when I got back. On the railing of the tower. Looking towards the vaults. The warlock chick was in front of me. Smiling."She said, "Hey there, handsome." I was a bit miffed, so all I could do was look at her. Then I turned around to look down at the city, and... "Oops!" Down I go to become a splat on the ground, some hundreds of feet below. Thanks for the revive, ghost."
[b]-Brawn Mighty, Male Striker Titan[/b]
"My warlock friends push me sometimes. But if they slap me, all I can do is flash my knife at them. It's depressing!"
[b]-Valentina Doretti, Female Bladedancer Hunter[/b]
"I can't be held accountable for all warlocks with anger issues. You know me. I've already given away my favorite shotgun to prove that my bad temper is gone. I've solved many disputes with that invective. Rarely used my hands."
[b]-Ikora Rey, Warlock Vanguard[/b]
"We hunters are the most lethal fighting machines engaged in this dark war. But quite frankly... it sucks when I argue with Ikora. Her slaps don't sting. They literally melt your face."
[b]-Cayde 6, Hunter Vanguard[/b]
"Did I just hear Cayde say that hunters are the most lethal fighting machines? Pardon me for a sec. I must give my force barrier a little refreshing."
[b]-Commander Zavala, Titan Vanguard[/b]
"OH! Haunt them as THEY haunt ME!"
[b]-Eris Morn[/b]
Please, Guardians. Learn to control your impulses. Do not attack one another. There are other ways to vent your anger on the battlefield. Face your enemies with your frustration and wreak havoc upon them. I don't want to hear anymore reports of warlocks slapping their comrades.
[b]-The Speaker[/b]
[u]Have you experienced something similar? Were you the one being put in an uncomfortable situation? Share in the comments below.[/u]
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Warlocks may play pinball with you, but don't ever go into a corner when a striker titan is with you. I learned that the hard way. He pancaked me against a wall before I even knew that could happen. [b]-Anonymous[/b]