My dearest midgets...I admire everything about you. As you cling to my shield like a magnet. You’re squeals of agony. Are like music to my ears. But do not mistake me for a monster. I do truly love my midgets. I would never intentionally destroy my midgets. They warn me of the impending danger...other bandits have tried to steal my midgets. They tried to take my only joy in life away from me! Just a man whose slowly melting away. Why how dare he! He must have been rather surprised when I mounted his head on a stick seconds after touching my midgets. Because I can see his stupid face outside my window. Such folly. He should of ashamed of himself. -sincerely, the lover of midgets.