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8/15/2016 10:14:40 PM
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I've been trying to get a better relationship with my dad for so long...

Before I carry on I'd just like to say I'm posting this here because if I put it on social media I'd probably get called an attention seeker and I don't really have anybody close to chat with to try and sort things out. Basically I want to see my dad more. I try so hard to get him to do things with me but there's always an excuse. His new wife dictates what he does, and for the most part that's catering to her family. I hate her guts for reasons I won't say, I'll just call her a homewrecker as a hint. I made the mistake of accepting the fact that he left to join her and visited them both just so I still have contact with him. The amount of times I've left their home with the feeling of wanting to self harm just to distract me from the pain of what is going on is overwhelming. For that reason I haven't been to his house for a long time and I have no plans to. I have straight up told him that she causes a lot of problems for me. I had 32 weeks of counselling at my school to try and help me not feel so bad about myself and my life. However he defends her by claiming that it isn't her but her illnesses. He seems to be the only one that can't see that she's a manipulative piece of shit and plays on barely being ill to have him wrapped around her fingers. Is it time that I just give up? I'm getting to the stage of where I believe the pain of not seeing him would be better than the pain of having both of them in my life. I know this is fairly deep for a place like this, but as I say I don't know where else I can ask for help. I have no friends that I can trust, my mum will just be biased and I do not want to cry for help on a platform where people know who I am. I'd also like to add that I am fully expecting trolls to come on to this thread and take the piss but I guess that's something I'll have to deal with. Thank you to anybody who helps me x

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  • Forget about him If he cares about you he'll reach out to you

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  • I'm really sorry that you have to deal with a dumbass for a Dad. Being a Dad myself, I can't imagine ever putting a woman before my own sons. But I've seen and been around many kids and a cfew Dads tha tare in this very situation. The only thing I'll preface is - There are 2 sides to every story. That said, with what yo have posted it would be easy to surmise that your Dad has chosen what it is that he wants in his life. Unfortunatley for you it seems to be her. I've seen manipulative -blam!- women who control men really easy, esprecially those who are only looking for 'those things' that a woman can offer him. It's a stupid thing to base your relationship on, but people do it. For your sake, I'd say leave him where he is and go on with your life. Trying to get what you desire out of him is just going to leave you miserable. He's not worth that if he isn't willing to be a part of your life. This probably isn't what you were looking for, but it's the only thing that you can do for yourself.

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  • -blam!- em, obviously you aren't that important to him. Sorry but it's true. I would try to 'prank' his wife though.

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  • Edited by STDs101: 8/16/2016 3:24:34 AM
    Give it some time. Your dad will come around and realize bros before hoes lol. Just be ready to be there for him once he realizes what type of woman she truly is. You'll be fine. One the other hand...[spoiler]-blam!- my dad[/spoiler]

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    • I'm sorry to hear that.. My friend's going through a similar situation where it seems his dad is purposefully distancing himself from his whole family. If that's true with your dad, it may be best for you to try to accept that and hold on to the family that still cares about you.

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      • Tbh I don't know what to say. I'm having a rough time with my family also. Looks like my parents are gonna split after being together for 20 years. But try and be positive.

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        • Be honest with his wife and tell her that you simply want to with your father. That's about all I can offer. Good luck tho

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          • Don't give up. I don't know her, but if she's causing a rift in the family, then she has to learn how to either move aside or move away entirely. Stick to your honesty, as well. Make sure your dad knows your perspective.

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            • Idk how I can help you really. I would say try to raise awareness on how she's manipulative, but that's stupid since you've done that. Try to record her being the manipulative person she is, according to you

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              • Bump

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