Step 1: Become Sgt. Avery Johnson, he knows what the ladies like ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
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Genius
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Toast/envelope
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Spray yourself with two whole cans of Axe and the bitches should start rolling in.
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Edited by theraputicGreen: 8/3/2016 4:58:46 PMStep 1) leave a cryptic note made of newspaper and magazine bits saying"I want to be inside you" where they will likely find it. They'll know who its from, don't worry they'll know who its from Step 2) ignore the restraining order, love knows no boundaries. Break in their house at night and stare at them while they sleep from the corner of their room. Step 3) after a few months, confront them and bring an offer of love, a freshly killed human heart. Proceed to shove it down their throat and watch as your love heart takes effect as they writhe on the floor in love with you, to the point their face turns blue and purple. Step 4) devour your new lover so no one else may have them and you two will be one for the rest of eternity . [spoiler]100% satisfaction garunteed. If you get arrested then you did it wrong[/spoiler]
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[b] [/b]
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you ask??
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Step 1: ask her to play destiny with you!
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Expected actual, serious advice. Was not disappointed. 👉😎👉
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do ladies like armor plating?
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Instructions unclear Sgt. Avery Johnson stuck in my basement
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What if your crush has kids but you don't ever want to have kids?
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Inb4 ban
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The Primarch feels... conflicted.
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Back in my day we didn't have no fancy smancy tanks, the whole platoon had two sticks and a rock! And we had to share the rock![spoiler]lets hope the ninjas don't take down another Sgt. Johnson post[/spoiler]
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[spoiler]JUST DO IT.[/spoiler]
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Instructions unclear: Gave girl Sgt. Johnson inside an envelope
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But I'm white?
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Instructions unclear I glassed a planet and joined the covenant. [spoiler][i][b]FOR SANGHEILIOS[/b][/i][/spoiler]
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Get your dick out and rock out [spoiler]For Harambee [/spoiler]
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[quote]Dear humanity, we regret being alien bastards, we regret coming to earth, and we most certainly regret the corps just blew up our raggedy ass fleet!!!![/quote] HOO RAH!
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Step 1: cri
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This one is easy. What you do is you never ask her so you never get your feelings hurt.
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Instructions unclear, became Master Chief
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Step 1: Just do it. What's the worst that could happen - she says no?
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( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)