...and you wake up suddenly. There standing at the foot of your bed is a stranger, looking right at you.
What would you do?
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It's probably just Quagmire, as long as your not female you'll be fine
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Grab one of the bats or knives near my bed and attack
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Aye bruh quit tickling my foot, ya boys tryna sleep. That or they wanna join the cult
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*lunges at figure* *delivers blows to the head* *get gun* *pull up chair about 5 feet behind unconscius body* *sit in chair* *call cops* *wait*
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" sup, what do you want"
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[b][i][u]You're walking in the woods There's no one around and your phone is dead Out of the corner of your eye you spot him: Shia LaBeouf. He's following you, about 30 feet back He gets down on all fours and breaks into a sprint He's gaining on you Shia LaBeouf You're looking for you car but you're all turned around He's almost upon you now and you can see there's blood on his face My God, there's blood everywhere! Running for you life (from Shia LaBeouf) He's brandishing a knife (It's Shia LaBeouf) Lurking in the shadows Hollywood superstar Shia LaBeouf Living in the woods (Shia LaBeouf) Killing for sport (Shia LaBeouf) Eating all the bodies Actual cannibal Shia LaBeouf Now it's dark and you seem to have lost him but you're hopelessly lost yourself Stranded with a murderer you creep silently through the underbrush Aha! In the distance A small cottage with a light on Hope! You move stealthily toward it but your leg! Ah! It's caught in a bear trap! Gnawing off your leg (Quiet, quiet) Limping to the cottage (Quiet, quiet) Now you're on the doorstep Sitting inside: Shia LaBeouf Sharpening an axe (Shia LaBeouf) But he doesn't hear you enter (Shia LaBeouf) You're sneaking up behind him Strangling superstar Shia LaBeouf Fighting for your life with Shia LaBeouf Wrestling a knife from Shia LaBeouf Stab him in his kidney Safe at last from Shia LaBeouf You limp into the dark woods blood oozing from your stump leg But you have won; you have beaten Shia LaBeouf Wait! He isn't dead (Shia surprise) There's a gun to your head and death in his eyes But you can do Jis Jitsu Body slam superstar Shia LaBeouf Ledendary fight with Shia LaBeouf Normal Tuesday night for Shia LaBeouf You try to swing an axe at Shia Labeouf But blood is draining fast from your stump leg He's dodging every swipe, he parries to the left You counter to the right, you catch him in the neck You're chopping his head now You have just decapitated Shia Labeouf His head Topples to the floor, expressionless You fall to your knees and catch your breath You're finally safe from Shia Labeouf ...[/u][/i][/b]
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Edited by CEO of Goth iHop: 8/10/2015 2:40:51 PMLook him dead in the eyes and masterb8 furiously while saying "I'm doing this for you." Garentee they will leave. [spoiler]inb4ban[/spoiler]
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Shot him or her in the leg and nock him or her out and call cops
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Bend over
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Its just a fellow member of the dark brotherhood.
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U wun sum fuk bby?
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Edited by AgentMizzmo: 8/2/2015 3:14:39 AM[i]I am awoken in the night, and I see a figure leaning over me. I pull my knife, and speak, "At the perfect time, the votes are hungry," I whisper and slice their chest open then slowly crush every alveoli in thee body follow by stomping in their chest cavity and slitting their throat. With each stab and kick and slash, the voices calm down, [b]Yes... More blood...[/b] [u]Make him a trophy![/u] The voices command, and I obey them. Then I string thee intestines across the house like Christmas decorations, and fall back to sleep, now that the voices are sated, for now.[/i]
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Im still waiting :/ think the coffee is cold now
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ITS REAL CANIBAL SHIA LEBOUF
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Oh hi shrek
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No shit man, this happens to me often. It's a phenomena called sleep paralysis in which the bodies motor cortex is not functioning, but the eyes are perceiving vision as though it were awake. This being said the mind is still half asleep, causing what I have taken to calling the black one to appear near my bed. I can't move, and I can't scream for help. Look it up if you want a better or actually medically accurate explanation.
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Shia surprise!
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Piss every where
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Wow! This is still ALIVE!
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Proceed to kick them out of my house. Literally, [i]kick[/i] the SOB out.
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Pull my convenient minigun from under my bed and kill him.
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Edited by Heliseum: 8/10/2015 11:35:51 AM[i]I see him not as an enemy. He is a trophy to collect.[/i]
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Depends
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Edited by ninjapanda18: 8/10/2015 11:20:13 AMKick them in the -blam!-ing gut and run sreaming bloody murder so the other people in my house wake up
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Spray them with urine
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If is a female, do it with her If is a male, put 3 round into his head